Callum Smith

"My Margaret"

2012-02-09T22:30:00.002Z

Frantic Assembly are good at emotion. Very good. More and more I find myself more emotionally involved and attached to a piece when it contains some kind of physicality - it feels like something else to grab on to, something somehow more tactile than just words. Music often makes me feel the same. Lovesong does both, and so much more, better than most.

A young and old version of the same couple recount their lives together - the search for happiness, success, love and marriage. Effortlessly and fluidly switching between the two, punctuated by beautifully crafted moments of physical theatre where young and old meet. It's not about the story, it's about the journey - a journey which has lasted a whole lifetime, as Maggie comes to the end of the road, leaving William to finish the life that somehow got away from them.

It's this interaction which is at the core - the most touching moments come when young and old meet, and the frantic physical dancing expresses more emotion than a simple dialogue would, much more tastefully and nuanced. To not be swept up by the emotion of this piece is almost unthinkable - it's the ethereal feeling of the physical theatre juxtaposed against the frightening reality and near-futility of real life which makes Lovesong so beautifully moving.

Lovesong is at the Glasgow Citizens until the 11th, then at the Sherman Theatre, Cardiff from the 15th - 18th February 2012.

Look Upon me and Know me Better Sir!

2011-12-04T17:16:00.001Z

It’s a new venture for the National Theatre of Scotland, but not an alien one. 5 years in the pipeline, Graham McLaren’s adaptation of Dickens’ A Christmas Carol is the 5-year old company’s first attempt at a Christmas show. Note the term, Christmas show – this is definitely a not a pantomime…

I managed to sneak along to a press call for this new production, and had the chance to speak with the cast and creative team. “The genesis for this was a conversation with Vicky Featherstone and John Tiffany about 4 or 5 years ago, when we discussed the possibility of a Christmas show. They said that NTS probably wouldn’t do that, as we’re a company without a home. How would we make a show which wasn’t poaching audiences from other shows?” says Graham McLaren, associate Director of NTS. The solution has been to create an intimate studio for just 90 spectators inside the Govan Town Hall, now known as “Film City”. It’s a high tech space with hidden speakers, state of the art yet subtle lighting systems, all disguised by an exquisite set – before they even start you can tell that this is a Christmas show with real class, as suited to adults as it is to children.

We are treated to a glimpse at a few scenes, the appearance of some of Gavin Glover’s incredible puppets being highlights. “Apart from a love of Dickens, I had no real intention to make this show. It was more about a problem solving exercise, but it did give me the opportunity to work with Gavin, who I’ve been headhunting for a while.” Says McLaren, who fresh from the success of his recent production of Ena Lamont Stewart’s “Men Should Weep” exudes an air of confidence and good humour. Clearly this cast and creative team, featuring Benny Young in the role of Scrooge, have gelled well together – with those citing themselves as puppeteers working effortlessly with those who proudly state that they are “actors”. This is a piece, however, where that boundary is extremely blurred. No attempt is made to hide the actor/puppeteers as they operate these life-size, gaunt looking marionettes, which appear from nooks and crannies in Scrooge’s mahogany office as if my magic. In full Victorian garb, Puppeteer Josh Elwell tells me “You have to push it, and see how much you can get away with when operating the puppet without being distracting”.

As the ghost of Christmas past zooms around the room and into the audience, its head illuminated by warm, incandescent light there is a notable chill in the air. You aren’t imagining it, the entire studio is temperature controlled. Someone else remarks that the room even smells old: McLaren quips that Benny Young, his senior, is responsible for that before admitting that there is no technological alchemy at work – it’s just the smell of the old furniture. Some might cry that a Christmas show, especially an adaptation of such a well-loved tale, is yet another safe bet by the National Theatre. After the sell-out tour of Higher Drama favourite “Men Should Weep”, and repeated success of Burke and Tiffany’s “Black Watch” it might be said that success with such shows in nearly guaranteed – they might be right, at the time of writing the show is nearly entirely sold out. Despite that, though, this still feels totally worthwhile – a spooky and beautifully crafted take on this classic work of literature, and a fitting introduction to the National theatre for those children (and adults) who might feel too old for a traditional pantomime (oh no they’re not…).

Inside-Out.

2011-10-14T21:51:00.004+01:00

Saturday Night
by Vanishing Point Theatre Co.

Sometimes I think they hold the doors of the theatre till the very last minute, just to build suspense. It feels like that a lot at the Tramway (the real reason is so that when actors are on stage when the audience enter, they don't get too tired or bored. Either that or things went very wrong, very last-minute.) Saturday Night, Vanishing Point's quasi-sequel to the much applauded Interiors subjected me to that tense pace around the foyer on Wednesday night. Walking into Tramway 1, you can't help but be excited, intrigued and curious as to what is going to happen on Kai Fischer's stunning two-story set.

For those of us who saw Interiors, we have a rough idea. The early-20th Century notion of Naturalism and Voyeurism taken to literal extremes, the audience acting as gawkers to a private event in someone's home. No words, just actions - but then again they say more than words ever could. This powerful company transfixes the audience's gaze for an hour and a half of pure voyeurism. This time, it's much darker, surreal even. When you can successfully couple naturalistic voyeurism and moments of complete surreality, you can appreciate the skill and craft of this entire company even more.

Sometimes that surrealism goes too far - one feels perhaps that there is no need. But this all just adds to the haunting semi-reality created by Matthew Lenton's style. It looks real, and one almost feels oneself being dragged into the world of the silent characters, but then every now and again, a costumed gorilla (don't ask) comes along to snap you back to the world of the Tramway, with almost Brechtian effect.

It's not to everyone's taste, but it's a unique theatrical experience, and for those of you who hate to be interacted with on a night at the theatre, the fourth wall really does exist on this most unique Saturday Night.

Elegies for Angels, Punks and Raging Queens

2011-10-14T21:49:00.000+01:00

Elegies for Angels, Punks and Raging Queens.
Insideout Productions in association with Upstage theatre Productions
27th September – 1st October
The Changeling House, Tron Theatre.

The shadow of AIDS is, somehow, less threatening than it once was. It shouldn’t be – even though instances have decreased in the west since the pandemic period of the 80s and 90s New York, the disease still claims lives with terrifying frequency. Like the disease itself “Elegies for Angels, Punks and Raging Queens” at the Tron this week, an 80s off-Broadway hit, has this sense of being placed in the past, despite this production’s valiant efforts to modernise and localise its content. In 2011 Russell and Hood’s “Musical Play” reminds us of the disease’s horrifying nature, and often relationship-strengthening consequences in an age where AIDS can feel distant and less pressing than it perhaps should.

“Elegies” moves with pace from person to person, tale to tale. The concept of a show where every character is dead from some form of contact with AIDS seems morbid, and it occasionally is, but it’s equally celebratory and jubilant in nature. More than this, however, it’s a series of monologues and uplifting musical numbers constructed to showcase beauty buried behind a debilitating disease. In this production, that beauty shines through not in the occasionally clichéd monologues but in the wall of harmonious sound created by this enormous cast. It’s more of a showcase for the incredible level of musical theatre talent out and working in the West of Scotland than anything. Full of recent graduates and a handful of familiar faces – “Elegies” is, perhaps surprisingly, an uplifting pleasure to behold.

These are musical theatre actors. Like it or not, there is almost always a division between those who act and can sing a bit, and those who can sing and act a bit too. The dilemma facing producers and directors of shows of Elegies’ nature (it’s billed as a “musical play”) is whether to cast a group of singing actors, or acting singers. The latter is, broadly speaking, the case in this production. Whilst that occasionally shows during the sometimes drawn-out monologues, littered with amateurish techniques for portraying anguish and sadness, it is more than made up for when these chanteurs and chanteuses belt their incredible numbers. They are all clearly more comfortable when they sing, and the audience cannot help but be carried along with them – whether that’s to uplifting euphoria or cathartic tragedy, it feels like we go between these extremes several times during the 2 hour show. Note must go to David Kristopher-Brown, Natalie Toyne and Gayle Telfer-Stevens, who sing with such skill, tenderness and power that one can’t help but be lead to wherever they’re going. The joy of Elegies is the ability of the incredible cast to explain their emotional patch in the quilt through song, tenderly, sensitively and utterly naturally. When faced with voices like these it’s impossible not to go along with them.

That was the year that was.

2011-04-14T13:38:00.003+01:00

Coming up on a year since the last post, it's time for another.

I'm now drawing to the close of my juniour honours year at Glasgow Uni, which has been challenging but in a good way. After the year abroad and a further summer away at Disney, I was keen to get back to uni life, get back into the books and take it head on. I did, to an extent, and one class I particularly enjoyed in the first semester was Performance Theory and Analysis with Katie Gough. I was warned and worried about this class - a whole semester of three hour classes on the "hows" and "whys" of theatre - theoritical crap I had never really gotten to grips with, but my solution for that was a radical one - I did the reading.

That's right, I did what I was told and let me tell you, it helped. I ended up loving the class, which was full of exchiting debate and discussion about various aspects of performance studies, ably led by Katie Gough, one of the smartest people I've ever met, despite her unfortunate affliction of being American.

I also started classes in Contemporary French Theatre and Bande Dessinée along with the usual French Language classes. Band Dessinée (Francophone comics), or BD, had been a class I had looked forward to since my first intorduction to the study of tintin in second year. Once again, led by the incredible Billy Grove, referred to as the "Don" of BD. Enriching, rewarding (and fun) this class has let me study exactly what I wanted with no limits or restrictions - my essay/research project was finally on experimental narratology in Bande Dessinée, looking at ways stories are constructed in populist and post modern comics, drawing on long forgotten knowledge from level one film and TV.

That semseter also saw Kevin Carr, Michale Egan and myself start a project we had talked about for a long time, our own radio show on Glasgow University's Subcity Radio. We went on the air in October with "The All Day Cheeky Breakfast", a weekly mix of "cheeky tunes and cheeky chat" from 10-12 on Fridays (find all our shows online at www.subcity.org/shows/cheekybreakfast). Whilst hauling myself out of bed for 10 on a Friday is occasionally challenging, the show has been immense fun, and has ended up pretty successful, never dropping out of the top ten shows, despite this being our first year, and there being over 100 shows on Subcity.

After Disney, which was by the way, incredible - this summer I worked in the World of Disney - the largest character merchandise store on earth, I came home and looked for a new job. Thankfully dad had taken up a new position with the old manager of Rogano and belligerent Restauranteur Gordon Yuill. He's known around the Glasgow restaurant scene for one thing - being a dick. He didn't disappoint too much. I started work as a waiter in August at the Merrylee Road Bar and Grill, which was an OK job. I felt the need not to go back to the Golf Club, despite good times and great friends made there, and after Disney and a year abroad the timing felt right to try something else. Eventually, one of the other waiters Nikhil left to go back to Rogano, and "proccured" me a job as well. I started working in Glasgow's oldest restaurant in November, and it has been great. Excellent tips, nice people and a real landmark for Glasgow. The shine might have come off her a bit, but she is still Glasgow's favourite restaurant. Café Rogano, where I work, is laid back enough and yet maintains a lot of the formality and service that I love about Restaurants.

November also saw a jaunt for us to Paris and Lyon to visit our buddies MC and Euan, doing their year abroad as law students in France's Gastronomic capital. The short time spent living la vie francaise made me pine a bit for my year abroad, and all the fun and adventure that came with it. Ansleigh is still out in Paris, and seeing her live her life in the capital with a great job as a language tutor just showed me that the world is my oyster with a language degree.

Christmas came and went, after pretty intense snowfall, and Semester 2 started in earnest. My new classes were Space, place and Peformance with Minty Donald and Modern German Theatre with Anselm Heinrich. Both have been superb, Anselm's enthusiasm has once again made it a pleasure to be taught by him, and Space, Place and Performance (Splace to you and I) has allowed me to take on projects I wouldn't have otherwise. My final project was a piece at the Lighthosuse in Glasgow, on the 6th floor viewing gallery involving interviews with Glaswegians on acetates attached to the windows. Visitors have been invited to leave their own messages to add to the piece. Intended as a one-day piece for my class, the manager of the Lighthouse was excited by the project and invited me to exhibit it for a month. We are now drawing to the end, and responses have been varied, to say the least, yet all have made me smile.

All this romanticising of my degree made it all the more hurtful when question marks were drawn over the future of numerous courses at the University, under the stewardship of economics professor Anton Muscatelli, the principal. An occupation of the Theatre studies building in December was the start of a string of protests anddemonstraations by students attempting to save their university from radical change and undemocratic decision making. I have been involved in some of the protests and organising, having met with the "consultation panels" charged with deciding on a future for the school of modern languages and cultures. Fitiing it in with uni work has been challenging, but it looks like we are making progress, as decisions look to be less radical and have been postponed to allow more time.

Looking forward I have a few essays to finish before the start of a long holiday, my last from uni. Friends are graduating who left me behind after the year abroad, but this just means I have had the chance to meet lots of new people. After that, I have pending applications with lots of theatre companies in the united states, hoping for one of their very competitve internships this summer. Time will tell what happens, but as per usual, it's all go.

Check...

2010-05-03T13:07:00.000+01:00

Hard to believe another big part of my life is over. It's never easy to say goodbye to something, and this has been as hard as I expected.

Before I left, I made the grand and confident proclamation that I would probably hate it when I arrived, things would get better in the middle and by the end I would be loving it and unwilling to leave. This was based on hearsay from past assistants as well as my own predictions. I also knew that a few weeks knowing no one would make things a million times worse.

When I arrived at this airport seven months ago, I was completely overwhelmed. It was a beautiful day, and I stepped off the plane onto the top stair and looked around me. There was nothing. Nothing. One runway, one plane (the one I had been on) and very few people. It was unlike no airport I had ever been to - completely silent. I went along with it, thinking this could be good. The airport itself is a nice little place and when I arrived it was still being finished off. Stepping into the arrivals hall there were no walls, just a big room with those fabric "lines" you see in post offices to keep you from escaping the passport check. I had bags to collect, so waited by the baggage belt for it to spring into life. I waited, and waited, until eventually the double doors at the back of the hall opened, and three men with trolleys piled high with baggage walked through the hall shouting "Trouver vos baggages". Confused, amused and scared I heaved my bags from the pile.

This parallel universe was quelled a bit after my collection by my "responsable" teacher Jacqueline Marcheix. We had been in contact via e-mail during the summer, trying to organise things from Orlando. She had managed to convince Monsieur de la Burgade to take me in for the year, and had told me she would collect me at the airport "holding a brightly coloured umbrella" so I could find her. The sight of someone who, admittedly, I didn't know, but who I had had contact with was somehow comforting. The kindness Jacqueline showed me in the first few days (and indeed the whole 7 months) - showing me round, welcoming me, dinner - made everything a bit easier. The first week of this life of solitude (I hadn't started working yet) was not easy. It was incredibly difficult to see how this experience could get better, what could possibly make it bearable for 7 months.

But it did. Ups and downs, highs and lows were a running theme of the first months. I can't hide the fact from anyone that I wasn't exactly happy in Limoges. The pace of life seemed so slow, I had so little to do, and until I met Ansleigh, Jon and Alex at the first training day I was miserable. Even after that I wasn't exactly thrilled to be spending my pre-emptively romanticised year abroad in Limoges, miserable and bored.

It wasn't the best start, but in hindsight I had too many expectations - living alone was a hinderance to friend making, but thankfully that came in time. And living with Monsieur was a better insight into France than I had thought it would be, though we spoke English most of the time, he was a great living dictionary, and very culturally aware. Friends came in time, bigger in number but those I had already made became much closer as time went by.

Time also brought more appreciation for the pace of life - despite the fact we are just an hour over "la manche" from France the cultural differences are immense. As I started to go the market every saturday, found my favourite places around the small yet charming city and settled in at school life got progressively better. This continued, quite exponentially, and our travels around France were always a lot of fun.

Now I sit here in the airport once more, about to end it and go home it doesn't feel quite right. Though I have been fully aware this was coming, the fact that it is now here seems somehow wrong, and I am genuinely upset to be leaving this all behind. I wouldn't claim that I enjoyed my life here more than I do back in Glasgow, which is somehow different to many other assistants, especially Americans. I, unlike many, am not disillusioned with my hometown, with the UK or with Glasgow, I love them all - there is a lot to love. I also love France, but life in the city you were born an raised in will, for me, always have an unfair advantage.

In despite of that I'm awfully glad to have done this, and to have done what I set out to do. My goals were to learn some French, travel at bit, make lots of friends and to experience the "real" French culture. As I leave Limoges and my year abroad behind I'm proud, happy and above all relived to say that I did all of the above. In many ways, that is the measure of a successful year abroad.

Right you were...

2010-04-24T16:38:00.002+01:00

Well, the past few weeks have yet again flown in, and it has been a long time since the last post. Needless to say it was taken up mostly by the Easter Break - I was very excited at the prospect of some travelling, but it ended up that everyone had their own plans or at the very least had no cash/time to come out. So, I decided after seeing mum and dad out here for the weekend that a few days at the flat on the beach would be lovely. So I set out for Malaga, got there and it was windy and cold... Eventually it brightened up, and I got too excited - ran outside without any lotion and got burnt. Nevertheless a nice relaxing few days.

So, I went back to the dear green place, rather reluctantly. I had wanted to travel, and knew I was coming home for good but the way things worked out that didn't come to pass. A few good nights came and went - we were also blessed with amazing weather for the first week. A great chance to enjoy Glasgow with people that had the time/money to come out. It seems that everyone is obsessing over this exam diet, and fair enough. A year without academia has been a welcome break, and I in no way envy those going into exams within the next few days.

So the days passed, and I had planned to go back to France on the Thursday, pick up a rental car and drive around for a while (alone or with whoever I could find...). Something got in the way. A massive cloud of apparently deadly volcanic ash sweeped over the UK, and the travel plans were scarpered. My gran had phoned, saying "I don't think you'll get away, there's been a volcano". We are starting to think she's going a a bit mad, so this suggestion was almost ignored. Right she was, the air was closed for business.

I used the extra days to do a bit more of what I wanted, and went to the Tramway to see some of the Glasgow International festival of Visual arts. This festival is getting better and better every 2 years, and the exhibits at the tramway this year were something else. Absolutely haunting, terrifying, immersive and challenging - few could see the Christoph Büchel work and not leave it having felt a great deal of emotion. I highly recommend it to you whether you are interested in art or not.

I re booked and re booked, and eventually thought it would go ahead on Wednesday. Got to the airport at 7AM to find that my flight to Paris was the only one cancelled. Never mind - a few more days could hardly hurt any more than it already had.

I had missed a whole week of classes, and more than that I had missed the last day with half of my classes. I was beginning to get anxious and annoyed, but finally got back to Limoges on Friday night, followed by a nice meal at la vache au plafond (curried mussels, slow cooked lamb and ice cream filled profiteroles, tasty) and drinks at le duc etienne. This morning, a few goods at the marché and now in the house, pottering and getting ready for my last week of lessons. It's almost over, and I will be very sad to leave Limoges and this life. It has changed from being a pleasure to a nightmare almost as often as the weather, but I have been extremely fortunate to meet the people I have, work with those I have and do what I have done. Early worries that my French wouldn't improve were ousted by encouragement from friends and teachers.

Before my year abroad, even before uni, I had a very romanticised vision of what this year would be like - I imagined a huge city, lots of French, my own apartment and a lot of other idealised images. Looking back I am almost glad I had little of that - I have been lucky enough to make a small group of very close friends and to live in a beautiful house with a great old chap who has shown me endless kindness. Limoges has also been a blessing in disguise - it's small enough to walk around, but big enough to find new things all the time. Despite near constant joking and moaning, overall I have loved this, and have once again struck it lucky on this adventure.

I'm very glad to check another item off my list of "stuff to do before you die".

"I have to go pi pi"

2010-03-08T21:55:00.007Z

It's been two short weeks since I got back to France, everything has moved very very quickly. First week I plodded along, saw people and got settled back in to life. Monsieur and I had lunch one Sunday and we drove out to Solignac and Châlucet for a little visit - he seems very determined for me to see as much as possible. Solignac is a little village about 20 mins from Limoges and is what you are imagining in your head is probably justified - very quaint, cobbled streets on steep hills and beautiful stone everywhere. The sun was splitting the sky and it all looked great. He let me know that all the English retirees come here and buy houses or build hideous new buildings. We saw a few of these awful structures that look like they belong in the south of Spain or in Florida.

We walked around the church, which for a village is really quite impressive.

20 minutes away is the ruins of "le Château de Châlucet". This hidden gem is like a big trail through the ruins of a medieval fortress which was scarcely used, until the hundred years war, at which time it was taken over and served pretty much it's opposite purpose.

The ruins are amazing, and the way it is set out makes everything quite accessible, if a little difficult to climb when the mud is wet. There is a big lookout tower which was sadly closed, but great views from everywhere and a great location on the river.

Classes have been good too. A few hiccups, but the main thing has been that one of my teachers is off on an extended basis. Whilst this was great for the first two weeks (less 8AM starts) its starting to cause a few issues, but he's off for a good reason. I've offered to take on whatever other classes are required, and the school (eventually) managed to find a replacement, but only for 3 days a week... Ah, France.

Have spent a lot of time with everyone, John is away for the weekend, but we had a party to say goodbye to Andrea, a Romanian girl we met a while back. Her internship is over, so true to fashion we had a cross dressing party, with messy results. Sad to think that soon we will all be saying "à bientôt"...

Last week we all saw the Martin Scorcesse film "Shutter Island", which was a headfuck but still very well done. Great stylistically, I really appreciated the whole aesthetic of it but just thought it was a little too long and perhaps too hard to follow, surprisingly good lead from Leo Dicaprio.

This weekend didn't forsee too much - had planned to do the big shop like a true housewife with Anaïs and Ansleigh. Did that and went off to Anne's for coffee with two guests from the UK. Was promised one of them was Scottish, but she was in fact ancestrally so. Interesting folk who had sailed the world for 10 years, but I felt somewhat of a cultural philistine compared to them...

Saturday night Alex had invited us for some Ice Cream in the true Limoges party style. Ended up I turned up and was confronted with a (somewhat underwhelming) "SURPRISE!". The real secret to surprising someone is having the party 3 weeks after your birthday.

We stayed around Alex's for a bit and then went off to Limoges' hottest nightspot "Le Speakeasy". It has to be the smallest club I've ever been to, and also one of the worst. In despite of this, we had a great wee night, and I'm really grateful to everyone who organised and attended, thanks guys! Thanks also to Alex for a tasty cake.

So that excitement over, the thrills kept coming. Sunday was Carnival in Limoges, so we headed out for the cultural event of the season.... Turned out to be quite enjoyable, in despite of my cynicism, with a nice wee parade and lots of confetti. The floats might have looked like they were made by an autistic child with a thing for cubism, but nonetheless we had fun. The only drawback was the cold, it was freezing and there was a really strong wind. Fittingly, the theme of the parade was "Limoges dans le vent", fronted by a windmill float. Coffee chez Lacey and Lizandro and back to the homestead. Folk came over to abuse the internet (Anaïs, Ansleigh and John's internet has been out for 2 weeks thanks to French laissez-faire philosophy) and a re-watching of one of my favorite films for the benefit of Goodfellas virgin Anaïs.

What a film.

The Government Inspector

2010-02-21T19:51:00.002Z

Communicado's latest production of The Government inspector has clearly been chosen for its relevance to today's political problems. The story of greed and corruption at the top is a hilariously black comedy, about an age old problem. Set in Russia, the show follows a local governor, played perfectly by John Bett, who instructs his contemporaries to "keep up appearances" for the arrival of an inspector in the coming days. A fretted misunderstanding leads the locals to believe that an errant traveller and nobody is in fact "somebody", and the belief that they are in fact the inspector. He is bribed and treated like royalty, as the production descends further and further into calamity. A love interest and a host of comic characters lend the production a quick pace and charming reverence.

A strong point comes in the form of music. Interludes are provided by the cast of Musos who play instruments ranging from the banjo to the snare drum in an eastern european style, toned to suit the moment. Vocal contributions add richness and depth to the music as the clever set changes behind the actors.

Excellent performances are provided by the entire cast and company, but none moreso than from our lead - scottish favorite and 7:84 founder member John Bett. His tone and delivery is incredible, and never feels overdone or forced, An incredibly natural performance which is also funny is a rarity, and is a strength of this production.

The only weakness is the length the production is overlong. The second act is much more interesting and concise than the first, as the first act occasionally dips into the danger zone of being boring due to the lack of "action" and the sheer amount of dialogue.

Despite this tiny drawback, the production is an absolute triumph and well worth a visit to the Tron. Could this be a resurgence of the political theatre and satire that made Scottish theatre great? This production doesn't provide overly obvious and naff jokes and references to current politics, but the link is far from tenuous. This cutting piece of satire does not disappoint.

The Government Inspector is on at The Tron, Glasgow until the 27th of February

Backbeat

2010-02-21T19:43:00.002Z

Backbeat at the citizens is the interesting and largely untold story of the 5th Beatle. This stage adaptation and re-imagining of the film for the stage tells the story of the legendary band's first foray into music in Hamburg in the 60s. Their 5th member, Stuart Sutcliffe, is an artist at heart and finds trouble settling into the band after meeting the love of his life. The production, however, sadly lets down what should be a fascinating and gripping tale.

Slowly paced, the production mainly seems to be overlong, especially in the first act, where one feels constantly in search of the next plot movement. The piece also feels constantly overdone, and overly fussed with. The constant interruption of tacky video projections make are not unlike something from "sin city", and really don't fit with a piece set in the 60s. In reality they simply distract from the action (sometimes this is a good thing...)

Sadly the main letdown in this production is in the lead actor Alex Robertson playing 5th Beatle Sutcliffe. His constant "moodiness" is obviously an attempt to portray the tormented mind of the artist, but comes across simply as static and bland. As my guest who has seen the original film put it "he was camping it up way too much". Apparently the comparisons in character portrayal between the two media are immense.

This poor performance is thankfully improved greatly by excellent support from XX playing John Lennon of History Boys and Gavin and Stacey fame. His comic timing is impeccable, though his performance can also be at times incredibly sentimental and touching. The one thing all of our "Beatles" can be applauded for is the musical interludes which punctuate the piece. They play with a great energy and vibrancy which livens up what would be otherwise an unbearably slow production. Note also has to go to the young Isabella Calthorpe playing Astrid, Sutcliffe's love interest who's delivery is subtle and heartfelt.

Overall this script has potential - the story when condensed is interesting both for those familiar with the tale of the 5th Beatle and those, like myself, who are merely fans with the music of one of the greatest bands in history. The production, and some of the acting, sadly lets down the piece which feels constantly fiddled with and overly fussy. It also needs serious cutting, the play comes in at a whopping 2h 35 and failed to hold my attention for this length of time. This has clearly been written with a nod to a potential future west end/ touring production, but needs serious work to get there.

Backbeat is on at the Citizens, Glasgow until the 6th of March

Smiles better

2010-02-19T00:58:00.002Z

Glasgow has been providing me with my fill of all the great culture it has to offer. They say absence makes the heart grow fonder - a year ago I could think of nothing better than moving out of Glasgow and into the big wide world. A few months living abroad in various places has led me to come to the opinion that Glasgow is even greater than I knew it was. I have always defended Glasgow to the death as I am very proud of our little city. It has a lot to offer - without doubt the best theatre scene in the UK outside of London, a great and upcoming art scene, one of the best music scenes in Europe, superb shopping and museums and for me it is a beautiful place. It's a city that will never ever be finished, and the juxtaposition of outrageous styles of architecture that simply don't work together are such a part of the charm. Next to the splendorous victorian architecture of Glasgow's boom times stand the more recent Manhattan style monstrosities and the cutting edge architecture of constant new development. The mismatched architecture is at times amusing, and is perfectly matched to the city and the people. These people are not only the friendliest in the world, I see them as the funniest. If yer patter is like water, ye can away an' shite.

The reason for this is simple - Glasgow was, is and always has been a city of constant change. In its colourful history it has ranged from the "second city of the empire" through to the pits of the earth, and a place of wretched destitution and poverty. Glasgow has been constantly striving for bigger and better things, and funnily enough the year I was born was a turning point for the city as it became European capital of culture. Since then, development and reform has made Glasgow one of the most desirable places to live in the UK, a centre of business, arts, sport and academia. Its a city (including suburbs) of around a million people, for me the perfect size, and of exceptional beauty. Not in the conventional sense of beauty as simply an aesthetic quality. The beauty of this great city lies within it - in its potential, its history, its self deprecating sense of humour but most of all in its people.

"Can you believe your eyes?"

2010-02-11T14:18:00.004Z

Wall of Death | National Theatre of Scotland | SECC Glasgow, then touring | Until Friday 12th

This piece, billed as a "once in a lifetime event" is indeed something you are unlikely to see ever again. It's an amalgamation of performance and installation art coupled with good old fashioned carnival showmanship. Wall of death is NTS' latest departure from conventional theatre, in which Glaswegian artist Stephen Skrynka defies death by facing up to his boyhood dream of riding the Wall of Death - basically a huge vertical bowl, in which skilled traveling families ride motorcycles and go-karts around at speeds of up to 100mph, glued to the wall by G forces alone.

The piece begins with his story, and the audience are invited to fill in question cards for the family. The artist then presents us with his installation piece, a carnival sideshow featuring animations and optical illusions played on old turntables, the audience being invited to constantly play and interact with the models. Eventually, the revving of motorbikes becomes more intense, and we are led through to the outside of the "wall of death" enclosure, where we can walk around and inspect the mammoth structure which has been touring the world since 1994. Back projected videos onto outside walls begin to piece together the artist's journey to learn the wall, and introduce us to the patriarch of the family - Ken Fox. Eventually, the revving of engines drowns out all other sounds, and the large shutter of the "stage" in front of the bowl opens to reveal the family and compere, who answer the questions put to them by the audience. They seem remarkably normal - somehow I was expecting something less so. Jovial comments about the lack of school effort, girlfriends and boyfriends of the leader's sons (who have been riding the wall since age 10) as well as great anecdotes about the show make this experience all the more personal, and for me made what we were about to see all the more real.

We are led up to the gallery of the wall, around 60 people gather round, and the amazing spectacle begins - with all members of the family and recent addition Kerri Camero riding around the wall at high speed, performing tricks, ducking and diving round the bowl literally inches from the audience above. Some ride with no hands, on the sides and fronts of the bike, and the finale presents three members riding simultaneously. The show itself is worth the admission, indeed we are constantly asked by the compere "Can you believe your eyes?". The stunts look impossible, and the personal connection we now feel with the family makes it all the more death defying - these are real people, and this (as the show's slogan states) is a way of life.

We are constantly expecting the artist Stephen Skrynka to get on a bike and join in. The ease with which the family have performed these acts makes us believe that this is a skill which could easily have been obtained in the 5 months that he has been training, and towards the end the audience begins to cheer for the artist - who states, rather sheepishly, that he will not be riding. He does, however, have a go - under the supervision and with the permission of his trainer, Ken Fox. He nervously circles the angled boards, trying to make his way onto the vertical wall, and seems to do so - if briefly, and is awarded thunderous applause from the audience, who begin to realise just how difficult this must be.

Skrynka's work has a long running theme of trying to "impersonate" the jobs of others (he has previosly tried to work as a cabbie in Glasgow in order to have his passengers perform for him in the back seat) and this may have been his toughest challenge yet. As a spectator, we feel great respect for the man who unlike most artists has literally put his life on the line for his work. The pre-show videos present images of him falling and injuring himself, and he tells us before the show that this is truly the hardest thing he has ever had to do.

Thankfully, the stunts have been left largely untempered with. The pre show "art" is an interesting pre cursor as to what we see next but the show itself is just that. It has thankfully been left plain and simply as the great spectacle that it is. The only thing unclear is the "point" of the piece, if one exists. What is Skrynka trying to say? The piece could be interpreted as social commentary about the plight of the traveling family (Ken Fox's wall is one of only three currently in operaton). Perhaps it is a piece about the nature of performance and spectacle. Maybe Skrynka is simply presenting the awe inspiring sight of this incredible family defying death several times a week.

Whatever he is doing, he is succeeding - two days on I can't stop thinking about the spectacle of is all - the smell of the engine fumes, the incredible noise of these machines and the sight of 4 skilled riders doing what looks to be utterly impossible. Stephen Skrynka's involvement encourages this notion of impossibility - and that's what makes this work.

Wall of death is at the SECC until Friday, the Aberdeen AECC from the 15th-17th of February and then plays the Edinburgh Royal Highland Centre from the 20th - 28th

"This is what we call drum and bass" - but not as you know it...

2010-02-03T14:25:00.003Z

The weeks have been flying in. Cannot believe we are in February, nor can I believe that I go home this weekend for the winter break. Unreal!

Dijon was amazing, great city, lots to see and do. Journey up there, graciously provided by Alexandrew was however hellish - 4 of us in the back of an averaged sized car = not fun 5 hour journey. Needless to say we got there, found the F1 hotel we were staying in and then set off to explore Dijon, and all of its mustardy promise.

It's a beautiful town, about the same size as Limoges but much nicer, and a lot more to do. Took "la tour de la chouette" - translated as the owl tour where you follow little owl arrows on the ground to see the major sites. It was a freezing cold January day but still lots of fun. We then went to La musée des beaux arts which for a small town like dijon was stunning - some truly excellent pieces in a beautiful building and such a wide variety of art.

Night came and we went to a little restaurant which was "traditionally Dijonais". Great food and wine - I had a homemade garlic sausage with sauerkraut and dijon mustard sauce (naturally) - beautiful, but spoiled by a dirty glass and a really crappy gingerbread crème brûlée. That makes 3 VERY disappointing crème brûlées I have had since I came to Limoges.

Anyway, out for some drinks in a rather strange bar/club featuring "rude boys" break dancing of their own free will. Some were not good. Not good at all. Back out to find somewhere else we were KNOCKED BACK from some other place for not being smart enough. Shocking, and that's never happened in Limoges...

Sunday we went in for some souvenirs (mustard and gingerbread) and then off in the car to the burgandy capital of the world Beaune. Looking for wine tasting, most stuff seemed to be closed because it was sunday, but we grabbed some lunch and walked around really quite a charming little town. Ended up visitng the highlight of the trip by chance - l'hôtel de dieu. It's a religious building, not quite a church, but was really a hospital for the sick of Burgandy in the 15th century. It's a stunning museum, full of amazing artifacts and such beautiful surroundings. The amazing tiled roof is apparently typical of the region.

Back to Limoges, the journey was made an hour longer due to a disastrous wrong turn...

Back at work, another week flex by, and then by Saturday I was off to the provincial town of Tulle, about an hour outside Limoges. We went to see out friends Kathryn and Laura who tempted us with a jazz festival. John and I arrived on Saturday, the girls had been there since Friday, so we were tired by the time we arrived, having walked through the hilly town of Tulle. Thankfully Laura had made a great dinner for us all. Much later, we headed out to the cold streets of Tulle, and towards this strange concert hall/converted warehouse on the edge of the town. Needless to say a long walk and a knee injury later we arrived at a strange warehouse, with booming techno/drum and bass leaking from the main room.

Anyway, we dumped our coats (no real cloakroom) and headed in to see a stage full of 2 DJs, a double bass and a flute creating this bizzare mix of music - which was strangely quite good. The french don't dance, they just sway and clap along, which makes for a surreal experience in many clubs and concerts. It was made all the more strange when the "band" part finished and then the DJ stayed on, playing a bizarre mix of "drum and bass" and salsa. Well, fed up of swaying we started dancing and had a bloody good night all in. Sadly Alex had a slip on the ice and hurt her knee, so was out of it for most of the night but managed to get a lift home from one of our Tulle contingent's friends.

Sunday we leisurely got up for a brisk walk around Tulle and a picnic lunch by the cathedral. Back to the flat, because it was just too cold we got ready and left in the evening.

School has been ticking by, and we are now at Wednesday. Had a porcelain buying session on Monday with Alex and then folk over for dinner in the evening. Friday beckons, when I head off to London to meet up with Katie Jay for a three show weekend, and a few exhibitions. Then on Sunday its up to Glasgow for the February break, which will be great!

It's all go.

How do you say "la fève"?

2010-01-21T19:27:00.003Z

Settled back into life, and I have a major apology to make.

I offer my unrepentant apologies to the city of Limoges. You are an under-appreciated gem, and have been far too easy to blame these past months. The truth of the matter is that Limoges itself is pretty great - nice enough town, safe, (some) stuff to do and it has a Monoprix, which puts it way above many smaller places in France.

These past months I seem to have done nothing nut complain about this and that, when really I have had it easy, and I'm starting to really love it. The life is easy, the food is great, and it's overall just a very relaxing experience. I have no deadlines, no exams, no pressures - I only work 12 hours a week and the rest of the time I spend doing whatever takes my fancy - how could I possibly have complained?. (well, I know why, and I won't completely apologise - it has been tough) What little work I do do is also very rewarding, fun, exciting and challenging - and I am appreciated at school as far as I can tell.

The amount of English I speak has been one thing that concerned me, but soon came the realisation that you cannot live in France without developing your language, and reassuring compliments from French cohorts have boosted my spirits in this department too.

Since getting back from the Christmas break I have also decided that I will take any offer, and not worry about feeling awkward, shy, lazy or dis-interested. This meant taking Monsieur up on any offer (well, not quite any offer - keep your perverse thoughts to yourselves...) and going to lunch or dinner with him and his friends. I've met a lot of them now, and they are all very nice. It's also the best opportunity I get to speak real French, and develop my skills in talking about not very much at all - one of the hardest things in learning a language is small talk (in fact, that's hard in English too, non?). This has led to me "making friends" with a lot of middle aged folk, one of whom fixed my jacket in return for me fixing her internet. The French are so very polite that any sort of meeting must result in at least a coffee and more often than not a 4 course lunch.

Work has been good, but I'm worried that I'm running out of time to do the things I want with the classes, and doing anything that spans more than one lesson is complicated because of my 2 week timetable. It doesn't help that my classes are often cancelled - they have a test, the teacher is ill, I am ill, there is a strike (the latter happens much more often that you might imagine, today for example). Aside from that, what I am doing seems to go really well, and the kids constantly surprise me with some excellent English.

The weeks have been flying in, and its now only 2 weeks till I fly home for the February break. This weekend promises a visit to Dijon, with all of its mustardy temptations.

Back to life, Back to Limoges again (In the style of Soul II Soul)

2010-01-04T13:15:00.003Z

So I'm back in Limoges after an amazing 2 week break back home.

But let's start at the most sensible place, the beginning. In the last 2 weeks in Limoges most of my classes were cancelled, so not a lot to report (that I can remember) on that front. On the Tuesday before we left, however, Ansleigh Jon and Anais hosted their Christmas party, which was lots of fun. I made posh caramel shortcake and some wee canapé type things which if I do say so myself were very good.....

The party was lots of fun, and lots of people came and brought interesting food and drink. It was spoiled, however by the neighbour coming up and complaining for a good 20 mins. Not that it was late, but anyway.

I left on the Friday morning, and boy oh boy was it a nightmare. On the Thursday night, Limoges was covered in one hell of a blanket of snow. There was so much of it, and so so quick. I thought nothing to it until Friday morning when I realised things might get problematic. I phoned a taxi extra early, and it just didn't come. I waited, thinking that there was no way I could walk with my 2 huge bags. Ended up that I had to walk, and luckily a kind old chap gave me a lift half way. Well, I had missed my train but they transfered me on to one an hour later. I arrived into Charles de Gaulle in time after a hellish transfer due to closed metro lines, snowed in walkways and what not. Eventually got to the airport and waited in the security line for an hour. The scene that followed was like something out of that crappy ITV programme Airline. Kids crying, fat Irish women screaming at the top of their lungs "I want to speak to Stellios, there's a bomb in me biscuit tin, I will never fly Easyjet agaaaiinn", Disgruntled and dourfaced airline employees taking it all in their stride. The Dublin flight had been cancelled, and the Glasgow one was delayed by about 2 hours.

Anyway, moving on - thanks to Katy McGuire for the lift I got back home later on that night. The 2 weeks were spent doing what I love best - a careful mixture of family and friends, driving my little car, loafing round the house and generally just doing all the stuff I miss from Glasgow. I ate so many Scottish breakfasts I cannot tell you.

On the Saturday I had a mishap, and slid on Black Ice in my car, straight into a parked Citroen. The owner came out straight away and I was caught. £700 later I sent the cheque and that was that... Painful.

Christmas fast approached as I continued to see friends, had my work night out and whatnot, and the day itself was amazing. Got what I expected - DVDs, books, novelty stuff and a few clothes. Never have I been more interested in the day and the ideas than the presents - I'm getting so old. I kept shouting at Abi for leaving wrapping paper lying around - what a bore. But the day was great, Granny Smith, though ill from the treatment, was up and Gran McGinty and Jamie came up for dinner after all the Uncles as per usual. Also, Dad was home in a surprising turn of events as the club was quiet. He "delegated" and spent the first Christmas day at home in a very long time.

The day is over so quickly, isn't it? Boxing Day came and Alex was arriving for her short stay with us. I picked her up at the bus station, and we had a quick tour of the dear green place and noodles at Ichiban - god they're good. We spent the evening in the not so convivial atmosphere of the hut, being a tough old bird she rolled with the punches so to speak.

We spent the next few days in museums, shopping, socialising, eating... Her last day we spent shopping and then Panto! We went to see, as a whole familt, Aladdin at the King's in what is a very very British tradition. How much she understood or found funny we will never know, there is a fair whack of Glaswegian humour in there, and Gerry Kelly's knees are totally inexplicable.

New year approached, and we found ourselves in Buff Club. It was excellent, and a great group was there. Most left awfully early to go wlsewhere, but a core team stuck it out to the end. Then came my last few days, dreading the thought of going back I squeezed in some more. New years day was the usual steak pie and drunkery with the extended family, and Justy, Stephen and I went to see Nine - bloody excellent by the way.

The second, my last day, we spend most of it in Sleazy's for food and drink, and must have been there for about 7 hours... Then came the journey home. Nightmare transfer in Paris meant I was late for the last train to Limoges. Found a cheap hotel and bedded for the night, and got a train (also delayed) this morning. Not cheap, but back in the chateau now.

Monsieur is in Barcelona, and I need to get shopping. Its back to reality right enough...

Merry Christmas

2009-12-25T15:20:00.003Z

A short one wishing everyone all the best wishes of the season. Hope everyone has a great day, and a very prosperous and healthy New Year.

I will update this before I go back to France - much to tell!
Callum

Worlde

2009-12-16T13:23:00.000Z

Wish you were here...?

2009-12-08T14:52:00.007Z

Set off on Saturday morning for a long journey to Albiez Montrond in the alps at 5AM. Not ideal.

Long train to Lyon via Vierzon, getting us there at about 12 O Clock. 9 of us in total, Jon, Adam, Alex, Ansleigh, Lizandro, Anaïs, Christina and Lacey rented 2 cars (with some difficulty) and drove 2 hours to Albiez Montrond, about an hour from Grenoble, in the Alps.

The journey was not too bad, I was supposedly navigating for Alex, but that fell apart when we got off the beaten track, and were taking directions in French over the phone. Mixing up the word "tunnel" for "chunnel" was a noted example. No use asking for an address as that didn't exist - the chalêt was just perched at the bottom of a mountain.

So, after the owner came down the hill to get us we climbed the winding roads - getting progressively higher and more snowy - and more picturesque. Absolutely breathtaking.

Then we arrived at the little chalêt - like something out of the sound of music it was exactly what we had all wanted. Beautifully furnished, and absolutley spotless - great kitchen, all open plan, "bébé foot" table and all the mod cons - great. Settled down for some dinner and a night "off piste".

Leisurely breakfast the next morning, and we took to the slopes (on sleds, of course). SO MUCH FUN! Real snow, all the neighbours dogs playing with us and surrounded by such beautiful landscape. It was also amazing that we were the only ones there, the place was deserted - the cable cars were off and no one else was "out to play". We eventually tired ourselves out and retired for lazy food and drink all night, safe in the knowledge of an early rise for the long trip back the next day.

Well, we all made it - just - and got back to Limoges last night. Today, 8AM class and have now just finished one with my nice Collège group at Renoir. They are the ones I shouted at last week. The teacher found out and obviously backed me up, wanting me to be harder on them. I think it must have done the trick. This week I was greeted with smiling faces and a present from one of the students, some French Christmas sweets called "Pâtes de Fruits" - they're basically big fruit pastilles but made with real fruit and much much nicer. They did keep chatting, but only because we were having so much fun doing a Christmas themed quiz, complete with sweets as prizes. All in all, one of the best lessons yet I think...

Thanks to Lacey Walker for the above photos by the way. Check out her blog if you fancy at http://hibouladybaby.blogspot.com/

"Are you taking the Mickey?"

2009-12-03T18:04:00.004Z

WHOA. What a week. GREAT thanksgiving dinner last Saturday thanks for Alex and Ansleigh and afterparty chez Adam.

Dinner was great, 20 people in the flat, and a variable plethora of southern/californan thanksgiving cuisine. Turkey was substituted by chicken.

Little clementines filled with sweet potato mash with a marshmallow hat, skin on mash, apple and celery stuffing, corn bread, garlic sautéed green beans, pumpkin pie, chocolate souflé cake and of course, what American meal would be complete without Apple Pie? That and lots of butter, of course.

It was all delicious, and well appreciated by the gang, many of whom I had sadly forgotten about. It was reassuring to speak to so many people though, many of whom have had similar experiences and issues, but everyone seemed to be happy. This past weekend really felt like a turning point.

Party afterwards at Adam's. Some were far gone. Enough said. Sunday spent recovering and cleaning the flat.

Work has been fun of course, too. Had Monday off and have had a few good classes since then. Feeling more settled at my 2nd school, Renoir, too after having met folk and finding some of the basics I should have a long time ago. Last night we went for dinner to an indian for Anais' birthday.

This weekend beckons with promise of a trip to the alps. Saturday morning we leave for few days in a chalet near Grenoble for winter fun in the snow. I can't wait!

The big news, this week, was Disney news. Last night I got an e-mail saying that "the Disney Recruiters are currently considering you for a role within the Walt Disney World Resort. However Disney cannot extend an offer to you at this time."

Crushed. More so because everyone else seemed to get a job. Needless to say I was more than a bit disappointed, despite my earlier promises that I wouldn't be.

But that was then, this is now. I was on a reserve list, and got an E-Mail this morning offering me a role in Merchandise starting the 25th of May.

well....... yeah. OK.

"They each have to kill a Gorilla"

2009-11-26T16:05:00.002Z

A fun enough few weeks. Monsieur is back, but away again next week for Christmas shopping in London. Speaking of which, it's only 3 weeks tomorrow until I come home for Christmas!

Limoges continues to provide veritable ups and downs of excitement and happiness. Mostly ups I am glad to report. We had the "stage" training day last week which was fun, it was great to spend the day speaking to fellow under-40s for a change. We realised that there are a fair few more assistants in Limoges than we had once thought, and most of them are coming to Ansleigh and Alex's Thanksgiving feast on Saturday - I can't wait, their menu sounds amazing.

Spent last weekend in London for my Disney 2010 interview. Left Friday night and arrived at Monsieur's apartment late in the evening. Because of flight/class times I had to fly into East Midlands Airport, In Nottingham - then a train to Loughborough station, then a Train to the big smoke. Needless to say the bus was late, so I was late for the train (though still in plenty of time). Went to pick up my pre-paid £21 ticket, and of course the machine broke down. Train was about to leave, so I got on. Conductor calls round - £49 lighter after having to buy a new ticket... merde. This would never happen on SNCF.

So anyway, arrived into London and Monsieur's AMAZINGLY located flat in soho.
Nearest Tube: Piccadilly Circus.
Enough said.

So, interviewed at Disney HQ on Saturday morning, same presentation (which was still fun) as last year and then a 3ish hour gap until interview. A full breakfast was in order. It was mildly satisfying... Quick look around Harrods for a laugh too.

Back for Interview which went pretty well. Was interviewing with another alumni, so that made it a bit easier. Questions were perhaps a bit more direct this year, and moe about why we would want to come back. I feel I gave the answer she was looking for (not just for fun, but for experience etc.) and nothing went horribly wrong, so that can only be a good thing. Should be finding out within the next few days. This year, if it doesn't come to be I won't be too distraught - hey, I've been there and done that (forgot to buy the T-Shirt, damn.)

Got changed out of the old suit and went for a wee walk, and to see what the show situation was. Ended up buying tickets for the 39 steps, and met up with uncle Jamie to see it. Was bloody good- very very funny. Old fawlty towers style slapstick and English/Scottish bashing. Loved it.

Early departure the next day back to Limoges. Shared a taxi home with some Spanish lady going to a music workshop, as well as acting as French-English interpreter. The rest of the day I spent sleeping...

Work has been just fine. Lots of teachers off ill, and a strike on Tuesday (how French) so not too taxing. Helped in the planning of a trip to the snow next weekend with the whole gang - looking forward to that and this weekend's thanksgiving festivities.

Ciao!

"Do you go into a lot of boxes, Callum?"

2009-11-12T14:04:00.002Z

This assistant lark is easy. I'm loving it! Good hours (apart from 8AM starts...), great fun, interesting, creative, constantly changing and all the kids are really nice. I've realised that as long as the material you teach is interesting, the students will be well behaved for the most part. The key is keeping their attention rather than constantly silencing them.

That can be difficult if you have specific topics to cover that end up being a bit boring with the activities planned. I have learned recently to stop trying to make an activity work if their interest weans too much - suddenly had flashbacks to school days. The attitude towards teaching is different here. Because they really only have one big set of exams, there is less focus on that and more on an all round education. I'm not sure what I think of it - for example, all students study every subject which grates on me (and the kids) a bit. I can imagine it being very frustrating having to do subjects you have no need for or interest in, but that's the way of the world here. They also do not segregate classes, for fear of elitism. All the teachers, students and assistants I have spoken to have conceded that separation of abilities in some subjects would be very beneficial, though I can see and have seen in the past the evidence that when you are placed in a lower class, the drive to succeed goes out the window. Maths was a prime example for me, as I was in a lower class full of eejits, I ended up gaining less and my effort went down a bit. A bit of a sticky point.

Life in Limoges continues to be a series of emotional ups and downs. Some days I feel great, happy to be here and doing this, contented with life and a few friends. Other days for no reason I dread the coming months. Look at my calendar longingly for the next trip home and wonder what this is all for. Its bizarre, as I rarely have such mood swings at home. Recently met all of Alex's French room-mates who are lovely, and it was very gratifying to speak some French for a change. I'm also trying to watch more French TV - they love game shows which is handy as they are much easier to follow than dramas. La Roue de la fortune (Wheel of Fortune) stands out as a favorite but the French version of blind date is also a larf and a harf.

Last night, we all went to the cinema as a group which was great. Saw 2012 dubbed into French - a typical hollywood disaster flick and well made. Cheesy as camambert, but still good for pure entertainment. Yesterday was a "jour férié" which is a day off, public holiday for Armistice day. Of course, this being France, most things closed.

Today I had classes from 8. Number one went very well, and number 2 and 3got off to a rocky start. I shant say exactly what happened on here, but friends can ask me through facebook and I'll be delighted to fill you in...

"Sexy..."

2009-11-05T20:02:00.003Z

Back down to earth with a bump.

Back in Limoges after a lovely 10 days in Glasgow for the French Toussaint holiday.

Glasgow was great - loved going home, seeing folk and having some fun. You only miss what you have when you are away from it. Though I would never say I am homesick, it's definitely a sobering experience and definitely a bit of a solitary one for the moment. Slipping seamlessly back into life in Glasgow was great, made all the better by the procurement of the green machine version 2.0 (cheers to mum and dad)

But after a long days travelling yesterday got back to Limoges last night. Left Clarkston at 7.15, airport for 7.45, flight at 9.30. Glasgow airport was chock-full of Celtic hooligans en route to Hamburg which was less pleasant. I did, however, discover that they have a Greggs the bakers in the terminal now - and the prices are THE SAME AS THEY ARE OUTSIDE! THIS MUST BE THE BEST NEWS EVER.

So flight to Paris and train into Central Paris. Two metro journeys took me to Paris Austerlitz. I had deliberately booked a later train as I would be cutting it fine in Paris if I had booked the early one. As sods law dictates I arrived in time for the earlier train, which was of course full.

So 2 1/2 hours waiting around in Austerlitz was less than pleasant but the train journey was just fine, 2 seats to myself and time flex. Arrived in Limoges around 8.30 and due to pouring rain took a very expensive taxi to le chateau.

This morning, late start and 2 classes which went very well indeed. Have done some washing, now watching TV.

Back into the swing of things, sad as that is...

"We would like to propose to you..."

2009-10-14T19:37:00.004+01:00

Days are going by now.

I have filled some of my time with cooking, going to the local markets and buying whetever I fancy and making something nice. Also now into the routine of a daily trip to the boulangerie for a baguette (où bien, banette) and some viennesories for breakfast.

So the weekend came, and a long lie was in order after a week of almost constant 7AM wake ups for 8AM classes. The long lie was not too long, and I was up and about for 11, and off for a walk to get some breakfast provisions. At the top of my street, I discovered an amazing little market, with everything I could really need. An excellent discovery, and I celebrated with a half kilo of mussels for tea.

So, headed home for some breakfast. Bit later, Jon (assistant from Cambridge) and I popped out for a walk around to find out just what was happening in this microcosm. BUSY. God, I was shocked how many people there were about, shopping, eating, drinking and what not. It was, however, Saturday. When you venture out any other day, especially Sunday/Monday the streets are dead, and the only folk out are school kids.

But anyway, Saturday was busy. We took a walk up to the train station, which is admittedly stunning. Very very nice. It looks by all accounts (on maps and in the landscape) to be miles away, but the edges of Limoges really are very close indeed. I also think a lot of folk back home have the impression (which is my fault) that I am living in some tiny village. Not the case, it is a city. A small, quiet city.

We went back to Jon's so I could check out their flat. Not bad at all, hardly le chateau, but still very roomy and convenient for them. Its attached to the old infirmary, which still has old medicine bottles and equipment left in it, giving the whole place a bit of a horror movie aura. Less pleasant.

Popped home for a short nap (why not?) and then pottered about. Jon ended up coming over for tea, and we devoured the mussels and some risotto. The former being excellent.

So, we ended up going out to check out what was happening in Limoges. We did what all brits do and went to an Irish bar and sat outside to avoid the band inside. The area around the cathedral (where the bar is) is really quite beautiful. All of Limoges is picturesque. The town is full of old beamed buildings, there are pedestranised streets with high townhouses, great churches and buildings, cobbled streets and winding lanes...

Anyone who comes to visit me is going to love it, and it would be a superb place for a short visit, a weekend... But being here for 7 months will NOT be all bad - its just a different experience, and probably will be a bit more serene than I am used to. Not that that's a bad thing.

I should remember that I am here, first and foremost, for my French. Even that is becoming more difficult as the teachers and students all want to speak English. It is, however, very satisfying to speak good French now and again. Occasionally the phone will ring with one of monsieur's friends on the line, a bit of friendly chat with Manuela the housekeeper twice a week or even with the "chicken lady" (as her shop frontage says) in the Marché.

So Jon, Ansleigh (from North Carolina), Alex (From California) and I sat around the bar for a while, and moved on to "Chez Bernard", a happening looking little place which was mobbed, inside and out. The French really do like their outside tables/drinking - as do I. So anyway, we struggled towards the bar and eventually sat down and were drowned out by rugby songs from guys at the bar - a taste of Glasgow???

Sought advice from locals on stuff to do, reports on "very little" were confirmed once again, but a few suggestions were put forward for clubs around the area - opinions from locals were definitely divided.

Sunday was (by necessity) quiet. Cooked some more grub, pottered around, walked around for no real reason... When I asked my class on Monday "what do you do on a Sunday here?" the response was "sleep". Excellent Idea

Classes started again on Monday, and my first "terminale" class - who are about 17/18 and seem to have a good level of English. Great class - they were receptive, entertained, fun, energetic - the lot. Great lift, even at 8AM. Frederick (the teacher) also found a way to change classes so I have no more 8AM starts on Mondays - great.

More good classes, a few nights sitting around, saw some people for communal TV watching. I have the best living arrangement - comfortable, HUGE, working internet, TV, no creepy horror scene annexes and little to no rent. That's definitely something to be thankful for.

"Are You Clark Kent's Brother?"

2009-10-09T09:28:00.003+01:00

These early starts are a shock to the system. I'm amazed that kids aren't late every day, I'm worried I will be soon enough.

So the past few days have been fun. Lots of introduction classes, where I have been trying to elicit talk from the students. In some classes, easy - helped along by a few very bright stars. In others, torture, especially the older ones as they are too self conscious to speak. Its the same as in Scotland, a struggle to get everyone talking.

So my approach has been to both answer questions and to ask them, and every question I got was expanded into a longer explanation by yours truly. The photos I brought with me have helped, people must think I LOVE uni, hardly the case as I just think its a great building. The trivia tit-bit that I have been using about Hogwarts being based on Glasgow uni has gone down well.

Today, another early rise (getting easier), and first class with Frederick which was good. Split into two halves, one being great and really enthusiastic whilst the other was not. Anyway. The best thing I did with them was to ask for suggested speaking topics for future classes - the variety included Skins (v. popular with teens here), UK schools, Harry Potter (naturally), Gossip Girl and the USA.

Jacqueline pointed out (very sensitively, I must say) that this blog is a bit more out there now than in the past. In fact, students I teach have access to it in a way (not that I see them being the least bit interested) so I will be toning down the personal details etc. for the time being. Must watch I don't get into bother here...

The weekend beckons. I could really get used to this "weekend off" thing - certainly a luxury I don't enjoy en Ecosse.

P.S The titles of these blogs are all questions asked by pupils in class. This was a classic.

"What's your zodiac profile?"

2009-10-06T21:58:00.002+01:00

So day one dawned. 645AM (ish) wake up call, for an 8AM lesson at Limousin. Torture.

But asides from that, getting into the classroom, talking to the kids, coming up with ideas etc was a lot of fun, and finally made me a bit more excited for the year.
First class with Hamid and a "seconde" was a bit strange. He had to give out some corrections, so I sat at the back whilst he did that, then a brief introduction and some questions forced out of the kids. The most difficult thing was gauging the level of language, and in both classes I had today the difference in ability in each class is astonishing. Unlike in the UK, levels of ability/interest are not separated into classes here.

So anyway, In Hamid's class he had organised a worksheet, which I narrated and then helped out with questions and answers. Fun being a teacher, so it is.

That done, went off to try and open a bank account, and had to get an appointment for that afternoon. Chilled at the house for a bit, and then back to school for 11 to meet with Jacqueline and off to Collège Renoir down the road for the first time.

Nice school, looks like a uni at the entrance, and an unreal mix of ages, like Limousin. It's a bizarre building, very very long and feels like an aircraft hanger. Met with Sylvie and some other teachers, all of whom were very very nice, and eagar to help with whatever. We sorted some scheduling things out, which was problematic because the gap between a class at Renoir and one at Limousin is too short for me to get there on time, or at least it is without killing myself on the way up the hill. Will have to see what transpires, basically which school is going to give in...

I was invited to lunch with Sylvie, and being polite I of course accepted. Trying to seem fluent, I accepted without hearing that it was at the fast food joint Quick, with her daughter who is a student at the school. Not that I had any problem with quick, but just hoped I wasn't intruding on anything and wasn't sure how to express that in French. In any case, I'm sure I wouldn't have been offered if I wasn't welcome.

So, after lunch dropped back off at Renoir and, thinking I knew exactly where I was going, walked home. This was not the case, and I got very lost and tired. Heavy bag, hilly city, inadequate map = not good.

Eventually reached home, and it was time to go to the bank again. What a calamity. Despite knowing I was Scottish she still found it hard to simplify anything for me, and laughed at me a bit when I tried my hardest. Can't blame her though, clearly Mr Inglis needs to add Banking Vocabulary to his S2 Vocab Booklets back at Williamwood... (nostalgia to the max there)

So, eventually, success! and a bank account was born. Back to the flat to rest my brain before the 5PM class at Renoir. Much more successful than the earlier attempt at Limousin, I had the whole class (with Sylvie at the back) and felt I did OK at getting them to talk and coming up with questions after a bit of a shaky start. Clearly this will take time.

Back home, a little quicker than last time, and in the flat for TV, flight booking for October break, snacks and now writing this in bed. A long, tiring, but altogether successful day.

CHECK!

Don't stand behind the desk...

2009-10-05T18:09:00.002+01:00

SO! today finally came. The day to meet everyone else, finally. Kendra stayed last night, and it was fun to welcome someone and show them round the mansion. She is in a town called Brive, around 2 hours away by train so to avoid an early start she had asked if anyone could put her up the night before. I offered round out of courtesy, but most people seemed to have booked their early morning train. So last night we pottered around for a while, ended up having to get a pizza as I had no food, and Limoges is DEAD on a Sunday, like all French towns. Monday isn't much better.

So an early rise for a 9AM start at L'IUFM, a short bus journey away. Greeted with tea, coffee, croissant and Pan au chocolat on arrival, we settled in the lecture theatre to hear about being an assistant. Chatted with some people I knew through facebook and felt a little bit more comfortable knowing I was not all alone.

Far from being repeated information, though it probably was, it felt re assuring to hear people talk so much in French and understand the lot. They also had invited some folks from a bank and the social security service to help us get sorted in those capacities. That was a bit more tricky to comprehend...

Everyone in the Limoges Académie is very friendly and helpful, they know that it's not the most exciting place, but also that it is nice to be somewhere smaller, and have just the right amount of self deprecating humour and pride - a bit like Glasgow in many respects.

We got chatting to a few Americans and an English guy along from us, and I realised how close they lived to me, which was a joy. Broke for lunch, looking for the Restaurant Universitaire, but ended up going to quick - the French fast food chain - which is awful.

Came back and we had been separated into classrooms based on what type of school/language you are (there are Spanish, Italian, German, Russian and English language assistants in Limoges). A lot more lessons on the basics of teaching, discipline, ideas and such things - which was interesting and for me, exciting. The prospect of planning my own lessons and teaching interesting subjects to my students is a really exciting prospect for me. I know that when I had language assistants, you really just wanted to speak with them, but most of them were so boring that that was not an option (I exclude, of course, my beloved Dorota from Grénoble in Advanced Higher French) There was one horrific, obnoxious, horrndously abrasive and overly forward American chap, who offered much amusement; "Yeah, I've already been working at the school for 3 weeks. I've just been to chilli. When kids don't do what I say I humiliate them. I'm a massive tool."

So the day was over, I had made some acquantances, and on the walk home realised that they were literally round the corner(s) from me. Two, Jon and Ansleigh, at Lycée Turgot in one direction and another, Alex, in the other. Hopefully the boredom and solitude is over. They did however confirm what I was already quite certain of - "il n'y a rien à faire à Limoges"

2009-10-02T13:01:00.004+01:00

Les bruits des os qui craquent

2009-10-01T21:54:00.000+01:00

So there have been no further blogs as there is very little to report.

I really landed on my feet, and I think that even more when I speak to other assistants - middle of nowhere, no flat, no people, shops, things to do. I have been (relatively) lucky.

Only trouble is I haven't met anyone. My training isn't until Monday and that's when I'll meet people. Bernard (the landlord) is really friendly and has lots of friends, so a good chance to talk some French, though he likes to speak English.

He also likes to travel, and as such is away to Portugal for a week. He has a flat there, one in London, Paris and Madrid. Looks like I'll be in the mansion on my own a bit, not a problem and in fact quite good as I can use the kitchen without any bother.

Also got my French mobile the other day (call me on +33 (0) 6.78.83.86.71) and had a bit more of a walk round town. It's small, but pretty damned picturesque. When you look out over the city (because its so hilly) you can see the hills and valleys, the Vienne river...

Today, was in the school to meet up with Bernard, a drama teacher, who was taking me along on a trip to a theatre. Wasn't to sure what it was about, didn't know anyone etc. but decided I should just go along and meet some more teachers and students. Ended up being an interesting part of a Francophone festival which is going on right now. A load of Lycées all read different texts through the year and decide on one to get a rehearsed reading and the author gets a cash prize. This was a play about child abuse, and what I did understand was very good - did have to concentrate very hard though...

Back to the empty house, and the rest of the day has been spent doing not very much at all. Thank god for online TV.

Restez Zen...

2009-09-29T18:28:00.003+01:00

This blog might go up and down the emotions. I know I shouldn't be so worried, and I don't want to give that impression to folks at home.

It IS lovely. Just sat in on a drama club which was really interesting (well, what I understood). Also bumped into the head, he seems a very hard man to please but I'll crack him.

Also invited along to a field trip to a theatre in town to watch a reading of some sort with some students. No idea what that will be, but feet first eh?

I really am fortunate to be here, the flat is so much better than I deserve!

You can phone the landline here, which will be cheaper than my mobile when I get one, on +33 058 770 5717.

I also have Skype. Username is callum_smith1234

CALL ME!

De Limoges à toi.

2009-09-29T13:59:00.002+01:00

So I'm here now. Arrived at the tiny wee airport yesterday after a bit of a mare with baggage at Edinburgh. When you buy 2 bags on Ryanair, you are paying to separate your luggage into 2 bags - not to double your weight. What an absolute joke. Ended up having to send mum and dad away with some stuff for them to post over.

Was greeted at the airport by the friendly face of Madame Jacqueline Marcheix, my "responsable" who has organised a lot of stuff up until now. First of all she took me to Monsieur de La Burgade's house, my new home. We arrived at this amazing big house, and once he opened the door I couldn't shut my mouth. This is really a castle, not a house. It's spread over 4 floors, there are about 7 bedrooms, and everything is antique. There are peculiar collections all over the place - old lightswitches, Hornby Trains, ancient Telephones... - and all the furniture used to belong to his family (the "de la" in his name means literally "of the" - in serious money).

We dumped my bags and re-arranged a few things in my room. Its a lovely big room, nice double bed and big windows, a little cupboard to the side with antique drawers and space for a little kettle etc if I want. I also have a bathroom just next door, and a shower down the hall. On this, the top floor, there are 4 bedrooms, but I am alone at the moment. There is no kitchen for me, but I can apparently use the kitchen downstairs if I like, and can watch TV when I want. M. de la Burgade is an absolute Anglophile- not only does he want to learn English, his house is full of all things British - portraits of the monarchy, flags, food, TV channels, furniture, books... It's an extra-ordinary house, but I really don't feel at home. It's a bit too grand, but I'm sure in time...

We went downstairs for a little chat with his neighbour - there's an old stable in the garden too. After a little chat we went on a bit of a tour of the city. It's compact, and the centre of the town is nice. The flat is really close to everything - the two schools and the city centre are all within walking distance easily of the house. We then went for Dinner at Madame Marcheix' house, in Couzeix - a suburb.

She took me for a bit of shopping en route and then we had a lovely dinner - a pâté and Potatoe pie, some nice ham, bread, salad and cheese, followed by a nice lemon meringue pie. They seemed to see this as a very blazé dinner, contrary to what I thought, and apologised for not making more effort...

I got a bit of information on my timetable from Jacqueline, and then they insisted i borrow a book from their extensive library. We then went back to M. de la Burgade's place, and he gave me a better tour, and let me know how to lock the doors and use the alarm etc. I now have my own keys to a veritable mansion.

Today I unpacked my things after a comfortable night's sleep. I met Jacqueline at the school around 11 and she gave me the tour, and introduced me to lots of teachers, all of whom were very welcoming and accommodating. Later on I am going to observe a drama class in the school. Did a bit of formal business, and got my lunch card. Lunch in the school will be the main meal of the day (€2.40).

Some of the students at the Lycée are about the same age, which could prove problematic later in the year... I have yet to hear from or visit my other school, Collège Renoir.

Instead of lunch at the school I went exploring through the town as I wasn't very hungry. It seems very nice, I have to say, but it is small and quiet. The public transport is all trams and busses, not that I have much need of them at the moment. There are a few nice shops, and a really nice covered market. Got an extra long ethernet cable, as M. de la Burgade won't have wi-fi because of health concerns, and tried to get a phone but the computer in the shop was broken. Will try again some other time.

Now back at the house. Despite everything having gone perfectly, and the city being quite nice I still don't really want to be here. Everyone and everything has been great - why don't I want to do this? I've had it easy - no need to look for a flat, everything sorted for me, a really nice teacher and landlord, cheap rent - the lot.

I know it will take time, I know things don't happen automatically blah blah blah, but still I just don't want to do this for 7 months, I want to go home already.

Vive la France!

2009-09-28T00:08:00.002+01:00

Well, it's the night before the big move. 6 ish weeks after Disney, now I am on another trip to go and live and work in the City of Limoges (I hadn't heard of it either) in rural France.

As part of my Degree at Glasgow uni I have to spend "an extended period" in a Francophone country, and I'm doing that by taking part in the British Council's assistantship scheme, whereby you are placed to work in a school for 7-9 months speaking English, and doing conversation type classes.

Limoges was by no means my first choice, nor is it one I was particularly thrilled with. The city does look picturesque, but my first choice had been Lyon, but with little option to change Limoges it was. Thankfully lots of other things have gone my way:

1. Ryanair currently fly direct from Edinburgh (though this stops next month.)

2. My mentor teacher, Madame Jacqueline Marcheix, seems extremely helpful and friendly

3. Lycée Léonard Limousin and Collège Renoir (my schools) seem of good repute, and both have big drama programs.

4. Through the amazing efforts of Madame Marcheix, I have accommodation sorted for my arrival. I will be renting the loft of an anglophile rich guy in the posh part of Limoges, minutes away from both schools. Cheap rent in return for helping this chap with his English now and again - deal.

5. Going to a smaller city avoids a lot of tourists, and therefore English. I am, after all, there to learn French.

6. The assistant wage is very handsome, for very little work - 12 hours a week to be precise.

I am going into this latest trip with a sense of anticipation and sadness however. Different to Disney this is quite a long program, though I will be back for Christmas. Because summer is a time where lots of people go away, I felt less anxious about what I would be missing back home. That's what's bothering me now, missing folk and their company. I really have a great group of friends in Glasgow, and I love the city so much that I will miss it all - hopefully Limoges will be exciting too.

I am also much less prepared and excited for this trip than I was for my stay with the mouse. I have been dreading this day more than looking forward to it, and to me that's because of the sense of belonging I feel to this place. I feel very at home in Glasgow, and am in a position of extreme comfort in my cushy middle class home. It's taken me up to this point to realise that life is only worth living with variety - I won't be young forever, and when opportunity knocks, it's up to us to answer.

Today - packing frantically, checking weight and final goodbye drinks at the Butterfly and the pig. I'm going to miss folk a whole lot. Tomorrow, Limoges.

"So long everybody, See ya real soon!"

2009-08-08T10:53:00.005+01:00

Well what can I say? This has been one of the best things I have ever been involved in. When I look back to getting the offer to work in food and beverage, and remember the utter turmoil I went through nearly turning it down out of fussiness I cannot believe I came so close to missing out on so much.

My last few weeks have been valiant attempts to get as much in as I could before I was forced out, but the niggling feeling always remained that soon this amazing journey would be over. In the past weeks have eaten out, a lot, and got all those last minute things done at the park. Work has also been a lot of fun, just as I am getting to know folk it's already time to pack up and hit the road, which is the greatest shame of all.

The last few days with the overarching sense of finality and ultimation has put somewhat of a downer on proceedings, but still had so much to do. The last days of work too were filled with a sense that things were all almost over before they had even had a chance to begin. The last few weeks, really now knowing people around the place, have been the most fun, and I will miss (almost) all of my fellow stands East cast members immensely.

On our last night in the parks we, went to the Magic Kingdom and ate at The Crystal Palace buffet, with Pooh, Tigger and friends which was fun. At ten we went out so see our last Wishes fireworks, which of course brought a tear to the eye of nearly everyone. I must have seen the show 30 times, but I will no longer be afraid to say that it consistently brings a "tear to a glass eye" as my mother would say. On our last night there was a lot more than just a single tear. I was ready to cry buckets because this was almost over. We finished dinner with desserts, took pictures along main street for a very long time, and eventually left for the last time all together.

The festive spirit made us all want to stay up and talk and remenice, but of course the horrific task of packing up 3 months of your life into a suitcase reared its ugly head. With a tight squeeze we packed up, only for Nichole, Valerie and Z to give us great gifts and cause an entire luggage re-shuffle.

Yesterday came, and it was time to say goodbye. One by one we left - Carlos V first, then Billy, then Medical Carlos, then David Godfrey and then David and I. Each goodbye seemed harder than the last, all of us promising to keep in touch and visit each other in the future. Though I know we will all stay in touch, and I plan to ensure that we do, no experience - not a further college program, not a ten year reunion, not a holiday together - will ever compare to the experience we have just been through. The sense of camarederie and friendship in apt 2708 seemed to know no bounds, when I heard stories of other apartments' arguments I could never imagine such a rift between us. That's not to say that it has always been an easy ride, but sharing your this amazing life experience with people who were complete strangers just 3 months ago is a surreal but changing experience.

As the apartment emptied the time grew nearer to leave. Valerie had to leave for work. Anything re-useable or left over was donated to Valerie, Nichole and Z and then it was all over. Karen left without us even realising, I left with David Godfrey and Nichole to drop him at the airport, we came back to Pick up Z and David Sergison. After a lot of arm twisting I accepted the Sergison's kind offer of a room for the night. We arrived at the beach club which was just excellent - such a nice resort. We dropped our bags, had one last steak and shake and then dropped off Z for work. Another tough goodbye. David, Nichole and I then saw "Funny People" (by the way, very average). Back at the resort it was time to say goodbye to Nichole. Our three American amigos were the best I could have ever imagined. Their boundless kindness and friendship was not only a lot of fun, but really made this a much more worthwhile experience. Though they are constantly saying that the program will not be the same without us (well, lets be honest...) I know that these next months will be great for all of them. Not only do they have the excitement of Halloween, Christmas and New Year at the resort to look forward to but they also have the advantage of time that we never experienced. Though 10 weeks seems like a while the time flies so quickly, that you realise how long it actually takes to become settled at work and at home. I would love to experience life working over the "holiday" period over here, as the entire resort is apparently transformed during the busiest time of the year (who knew that? Would have thought it was summer..?)

The Sergisons kindly took me to dinner, and refused to let me pay, Maria then made me a very comfortable comfortable bed upstairs. I must say that the elder Sergisons are exactly as I imagined them having talked to David. Their kindness was a great help, and saved me a lot of hastle. Their resort (The beach club) is also fantastic. Right near the Boardwalk and within walking distance to Epcot. Next time we come here, I plan on convincing Mum and Dad of the benefits of a Disney Resort - as If I wasn't bad enough my Disney training/brainwashing has made me a lot more pernickety about service, courtesy, quality... Only the best will do for Disney.

The experience of working for one of the biggest and undoubtedly best entertainment companies in the world has taught me a lot about not only service and show, but also about people. Being thrust into a completely foreign world with complete strangers was not only daunting but also edifying. I must applaud Disney on their process of training which is efficient, fun and most of all useful. They know exactly what they want from both Cast Members and from what they offer at the parks and resorts - no one can say that they don't do it well. They are the best in the business, but not automatically. When you can see what goes on "backstage" to make things happen you can then and only then fully appreciate the scale of this operation - the Florida site has over 62 000 cast members.

I want to thank all of the following people, many of whom I have probably forgotten:

David, Billy, David, Carlos and Carlos for being the best room-mates I could have ever asked for.
Nichole and Valerie for being so kind, funny and fun to be around
Z for being constantly ready for anything, and always a joy
Karen and Becki for being our "bezzies" in the first weeks and all the way until the end. We know it was an ordeal.
Faith and Tim for an excellent "Traditions" class, which set me up for success on the program.
Mario Davia for his excellent training, which both put me at ease and made me feel right at home in the Magic Kingdom.
Everyone at work - Nick, Maddie, Jessica x 2, Melane, Chris, Sadamy, Jordan, Alexis, Nancy, Fanise, Barbara, Fernando, Katie, Luis, Dominique, Patrick, Tabatha, Murphy, Amber, Tina, Emma, London, Kelly, Liz, Allen, Julie, Yann, Arnaud, Jordan, Kristen, Ozzie, Richie, Don, Rita, Angela, Cory, John and everyone else I have forgotten to include for making work fun, exciting and something I looked forward to.
Most of the stands east managers - but especially Carolyn and Robert for their friendliness
The Sergisons for their great hospitality on my last night
My Mum, Dad, brother and sister for all their support both emotional and practical
My friends back home for giving me just the right amount of slagging for this crazy scheme.

I cannot possibly write here what a great time I had, and how much I feel I have learned from this experience. I would urge anyone who has any interest in marketing, tourism, management, hospitality, theatre/events..... (the list goes on) to apply for the program, do it and make the most of it. Though this is premature, the experience has cemented in my head the idea of a career with this amazing company one day - maybe not in the immediate future, but one day.

See something? SAY SOMETHING!

2009-07-17T17:45:00.002+01:00

The fun just never stops, does it? Work, fun, work fun - thats the way it seems to go and it has all been good. recently met Kate and Lauren for dinner at the rainforest café. The restaurant is crap but it was really good seeing them, then of course they came to see me at work yesterday. Yesterday was a good day, started at 10.45 (suspiciously early) and worked at scuttles for a while. My new signiature is to put a Mickey Mouse shape on the top of all the slushies I make - magical moments all over the joint. Worked there for a while, had my 15 minute monster break and then headed to the pretzel wagon, my favourite place. Nice and quiet all day in the park so had fun just waving to kids with a Mickey glove on and giving people directions. It may have been as hot as hell out there but I still had fun.

I was just standing around waving with this big Mickey glove and then noticed out of the corner of my eye a woman walking towards me with a litter picker and a radio on her belt. It was Meg Crofton, who is head of foods at the Magic Kingdom - pretty much my big boss. Never met here before but she came up and shook my hand and thanked me for being so welcoming and standing outside. Nice little lift to the day, which really only got better. Finished at 4.45 and headed to Epcot with Nick where I rode a segway, drank weird soft drinks from around the world, did Ellen's Energy Adventure in the quest of having rode every ride and also Soarin' for the first time - absolutely incredible.

Today, woke up late and then got a phone call from work - "this is cast deployment, do you want a day off Callum?"

Ummm... YEAH.

Dumbo is 101.

2009-07-10T16:05:00.002+01:00

Work has been good! 4th of July was fun, I was on pretzel wagon all day, and oh boy it was hot and crazily busy, but then again I could have been at Friar's Nook. We had fights and whatnot with the amount of people in the park, and my register showed over 965 transactions in the day from 11AM until 12AM - which is a lot.

The buses were also a nightmare on the 3rd and 4th, trying to get home at certain times becomes an evolutionary battle of the fittest affair, with people literally running to try and get on the buses back to Vista. Sometimes all you can do is laugh.

We were a little overstaffed the rest of the week, so I had my regulation 2 days off that week too. Ended up raining for a large part of those days off though, but still managed to go to the outlets and to Hollywood Studios, where the lines were unbelievably short - Oh what fun. Since then I've been working - closing mostly lates but yesterday I got my first Early Release to about 7PM, so I went to Epcot to meet Nichole, Val and David (2). They had fast passes for Soarin' so I met them outside and we went to test track, and waited in the single riders line. Did it and all was fine, but luckily Fabbiola was working (we kind of know her) and she let us ride again straight away. Basically the coolest thing ever.

Came home briefly and then decided to go to Planet Hollywood for tea, then to see Bruno. It was hilarious, but if you are at all squeamish you probably won't enjoy it so much...

A "Cast First" Community.

2009-07-04T16:40:00.002+01:00

Visited the Disney made town of Celebration, just of I-Drive on Thursday. What a bizarre but great wee place. It was built to be the perfect town, and Disney controlled what came in and who could live there etc. but they don't own it any more. It is still amazing though, we had a nice lunch in the Market Street Café, which was a very cool and busy little diner type place, very New York stylee inside. Then we took a little walk, as the weather had cleared up and came accross an arcade that rented bikes - why not. Nichole, Val, Dave and David and I all rented one and went on a little cycle round this place, really really beautiful, I have to say. It's about the only place in Orlando where I think I could actually live - it really is a self sufficient town and the best part is that you can actually WALK places, unlike everywhere else here where pavements are either non-existent or just end for no reason. Then I bought $7 worth of Jelly Belly Jelly Beans.

Went back to "the way", dropped David at work and then went to Cast Connection - basically the place for cast members to buy really cheap stuff that is either damaged, end of the line, old or lost and found. What a place - I bought so much crap, all for like a dollar each. All I kept thinking was "mum and dad would love this place". They had designer sunglasses etc that people had lost for 25 cents each, as a good example. Basically, you can all look forward to a gift when I return. Back to "the way" again and then off to Hollywood Studios for the night, did a couple of rides, saw fantasmic and then waited for David to finish work, then we went to iHOP at like 2am, oh the fun.

Back at work yesterday, and an OK day was had. Got to watch the special 4th of July fireworks (on the 3rd) which were absolutely STONKING. They had them going off right round the park, so you didn't know where to look, but they were absolutely amazing. Will hopefully get to see them again tonight. Had a silly argumement with one of my (many) managers however, was all a bit out of proportion, but we were both as stubbourn as each other. All seemed to end amicably, however.

Today is the 4th of July, and the park is projected to have 90 000 guests - hold tight.

No Strings Attached

2009-06-29T04:33:00.004+01:00

The rat race is well and truly on, and that's no bad thing, because the times in between are now even more fun. Am having loads of fun with all of our friends, whatever we may be doing. Also having more and more fun at work as I meet and get to know more folk, the vast majority of whom are really friendly, funny and hard working (of course, even at Disney, there are some lazy arses.)

Today was fun, woke up mega early to go to the cast member preview of The new Hall of Presidents. It's something I've never done when we have visited, and it's a shame more people haven't because for all it is a bit long, the technology is amazing - some 40 odd Animatronic presidents, all incredibly lifelike. There's a good wee film before, and then speeches from Washington, Lincoln and now: Obama. A really great narration from Morgan Freeman keeps you going, and the whole aesthetic of the thing is just great. After that we mucked around, and got Becki to finally go on thunder and splash. and had a great wee time to ourselves, all before work even started at 11. I was also out today by 6, which was great! Work was also OK - fry scoop in the nook, which was OK because it was busy, and then register at Scuttles - hot as hell but also OK.

Nichole very kindly took me for some shopping at Target, but couldn't be doing with cooking. Tonight, David, Karen and Becki went to the House of Blues - I wasn't in the mood, so Nichole, David 2 and I went to Steak and Shake - oooohhh yeeaaaah.

Faith, Trust and Pixie Dust

2009-06-26T06:24:00.002+01:00

Busy busy busy. Work work work. Fun Fun Fun!

Recently got my confirmation letter for France - will be in an OK looking school called Lycée Léonard Limousin in the centre of Limoges for 7 months. Attempts to contact the school have been fruitless so far so I am phoning the British Council (organisers) tomorrow for advice. The family leave for Spain tomorrow so need to phone that lot too.

Work has been OK, nothing too exciting. A new menu at the Fry shoppe, but still as quiet as ever most days - now my least favorite location, and sadly where I seem to be most often. Oh well.

Tuesday I hung around for a while and then Nichole, Vanessa and I went to my favorite eatery from way back when - Steak and Shake. What an establishment - we did have to wait a while, but those shake and that steakburger was just so damned good. Took me back to our first holiday, because I realised that was the place we walked by almost every night. Mum and Dad will no doubt remember it - there used to be a Tony Roma's there and the next time we came back it was gone. A whole new appreciation for Dad's walet on this trip...Did an extra shift on my day off Tuesday working at Fantasmic! as a food vendor, was not as fun as I thought it might be. Forgot my shoes but luckily Carlos works there and got me a pair of loaner ones - they were 2 sizes too small, however, so all I could think about was how much my feet ached. I was also put on a register at the top of the ampitheatre - not ideal, I wanted to be a vendor in the crowd! Had to do my own bank out, but all in all a pretty easy shift - would definitely consider again. For a picture of my stunner of a costume from this escapade, check my facebook.

Yesterday, Karen, David and I went to Magic Kingdom and did all sorts of fun things - Thunder Mountain, Splash Mountain, Carousel of Progress, Country bear Jamboree, Buzz Lightyear, Monsters Inc and Jungle cruise. We also watched the parade which was really good, hadn't seen it yet and was good to get a half decent view. Saw a bit of the street party too which seemed really fun. Went home around 7 and then had some dinner. Straight out again to downtown disney to see The hangover - what a good film - so so funny!

Today was like a half shut knife all day - just "a half a click off" as one of my colleagues said. Didn't want to be in fry shoppe, but was saved by a break, some food and a transfer to Mrs Pott's. Pre-closed Scuttles Landing and then came home. Went to Wendy's next door which was balls - waited HALF AN HOUR - they got my order wrong and it was highly average when they got it right. Will send an assertive e-mail in the hope of some vouchers...

Extra Tragic Hours

2009-06-22T06:57:00.003+01:00

Been a while since last blog - have been very very busy with work and fun in between. Well it has been a fun week, plenty of work in all different places and some more training here and there. I got a Great service fanatic award for standing outside the Pretzel Wagon and talking to people which was great. The awards are just a way of recognising good work, plus they are marked on your record card and you are put into a prize draw every month. It was nice to get one so early, and then a few days later my trainer Barb gave me a new one - the comment said "Walt would be proud of you, you ARE the basics" which was awfully nice. She is a really nice old lady - kind and patient and really affectionate with her colleagues. She is married to one of the coordinators Don which makes for an interesting dynamic. I had training with her this week on Tomorrowland which was fun, Auntie Gravity's galactic goodies is cool, but the Lunching Pad is not- that's where they sell the turkey legs which stink to high heaven... If you have never seen a 6 year old trying to eat one of these things when it's bigger than his face then it is worth the 9 hour flight out here just to see.

Have been out and about a lot more with Valerie and Nichole - our new American friends. Went to Target - a classier Wal-Mart - and we went to Hollywood studios on my day off last week for funsies. Was good - watched the Indiana Jones show which was really good, Tower of Terror, Rock N Roller Coaster, Muppet Vision, the animation academy and a couple of other things. Tried to get into the finale show of the new American Idol Experience attraction but it was full - it's basically a replica of the TV show and guests can audition through the day for the heats and then they are whittled down to the final by the audience who vote with keypads. The winner of the final show gets a "golden ticket" to skip the lines at a real audition which is quite cool. It is a really amazing re-creation of the set, we were watching on the screen outside for a while.

Getting into the swing of things at work now too - long shifts which are quite repetitive but you have good days and bad - yesterday was awful - 11.30 start, worked in Fry shop on register for a while then Scuttle's - my two least favorites and it was extremely hot all day. Too hot, in fact, for the slushi machine to keep up, and it packed in. A whole host of aggro coming my way which was not fun, and a constant line which meant I couldn't even try to fix it. Today, by contrast, was fun - in Pott's for a bit and then to the Pretzel wagon which was fine and dandy. Got to watch wishes and closed at 11 - out for half 12 and back home. Next week's schedule seems to be up - doesn't look too bad but poor Billy has about 60 hours...

Tomorrow we are going to Ponderosa for breakfast and then I have work at 4 till midnight. Tuesday I picked up a shift working for outdoor foods at Fantasmic ("POPCORN, GET YOUR POPCORN" complete with vendor tray and flat cap) and then Wednesday is my proper day off.

Wash, Rinse, Sanitise/ze.

2009-06-14T04:27:00.002+01:00

Good few days - busy busy with work and not much more, but it has been all good in the hood. Yesterday worked for a bit in Pott's and on the Pretzel Wagon again which is hot hot hot but fun because you can kind of fly solo a bit. Also plenty of excuses to give away free food about to be spoilage towards the end of the night. American kids of all ages seem to love pretzels - I don't think I have ever actually had one but I see people eat them a lot with mustard - that makes me want one a lot. Yesterday I forgot my name tag, and so was called Dave from Orlando, Florida all day.

Today I did some washing and tidied a bit, had some delicious pork and pasta for lunch and watched a few more episodes of the US office. I'm into season 4 now and boy howdy it just keeps getting better. As my brother Robbie might say "What a LOL" or maybe the lesser used"LOLCAKES". Today I worked at Scuttle's for what seemed like a firey hot eternity, then had break, then at Enchanted Grove with Mohammed then we were moved to Fry Shop. CDS (the system that gives you tasks) doesn't seem to work at all so we just do what we are told. Except when it doesn't suit too well - "The computer told me to come here and fill orders for a while. Yes I know there's already 8 people here, but the computer told me to!".

Closed down Fry shop which was disgusting and greasy but not too bad. I cannot believe how quiet that place seems to be. They used to have McDonalds Fries, but Ronald and Mickey had a falling out, and there are no longer any McDonalds Franchises in the parks. Apparently, custom has dropped about 80% - just shows you how a brand name can affect business.

Dave went to the hospital the other day and had to get a big splint and crutches - will be out of work for at least a week. Disney seems OK about it thought which is good - hopefully he will be back up and about soon. Also, heard through the Facebook grapevine that the first Brit has given in and went home - couldn't hack the work etc. Scary but I think we will all last the course.

Tomorrow some more training and then work but Finish at 915 which means I don't have to close any locations - good news.

Bring the basics to life.

2009-06-11T05:10:00.003+01:00

Well, it's been a good few days. On Saturday had my assessment, but not before a bit of last minute training with Fernando. This turned out to involve having to go to costuming with him to rake through everyone at the Magic Kingdom's filthy sweaty smelly clothes for like 2 hours to find his phone which he left in his shorts pocket That was less than fun, but when you are getting paid for it who cares. The laundry truck was pulling up and we still hadn't found it when at the last minute, in the last crate I found it. Many group hugs with the big mama who works in costuming ensued, and it was all fine in the end. Anyway, later on had the assessment which was a cake walk - passed no problem and am now a certified Mr Wippy, though my Ice Cream cone consistency can be somewhat lacking...

Sunday was my first official day having "earned my ears" which was cool. Worked in Pott's mostly - filling orders and working the register. Got a bit monotonous eventually but I soon realised - yet AGAIN - that I will only enjoy this if I talk to the guests a bit. Disney is good at not getting upset if you take five minutes to talk to a guest - even if there is a queue. There might be fifty people waiting behind them, but as long as they want to talk so should you.

Monday morning we set off early for Animal Kingdom and had a great wee time to ourselves. Me, David 2 and Karen all went on Everest twice (Got to be one of the best rides about) and the Primeval whirl, Dinosaur and a few other bits and bobs. Becki joined later and we had some lunch. I reignited my love of a barbecue pulled pork sandwich and later bought a "make it at home" version of sed sandwich. David and Becki went off and Karen and I used our Fastpasses for the river rapids and got soaked right at the start of the ride. Oh well.

Went home for a power hour and then went to Wal-Mart and spent a fortune on food - I am well stocked now but worried about the amount I am spending, especially now I know I am going to France. That's gonna be expensive too and am now thinking for both money and time reasons I will have to curtail my American adventure after the program to perhaps just New york and Boston. It will still be a lot of fun I'm sure and will cut out a lot of expense and hassle - I have all the time in the world to come back and do coast to coast properly! In recognition of this I had a massive steak for dinner...

Yesterday had a bit of a lazy day - ran some errands and just chilled a bit. Watched the end of season 3 of the American Office online - what a finish! Cannot wait to get started on Season 4. I still contend that the US version is better than the UK one. Commence rotten apple throwing......NOW.

Last night dragged Becki and Dave 2 to Hollywood studios where we did The great movie ride with a crappy tour guide, Toy story Mania which was ace again and then JUST made it on to Tower of Terror. Last night cemented my approval of TOT as the best ride in any Disney Park.Of course, Becki chickened out again - the new aim is to get her on TOT before we leave. NEVER GONNA HAPPEN. She is (almost) as bad as my dad. Stayed and watched the 10.30 showing of Fantasmic which was, as usual, fantastic.

Today had to get up at half 5 for my Social security appointment which was not cool, Got to the place and had to sit in a queue - London Embassy all over again but for like a quarter of the time. They were awfully cranky with us too - "STOP TALKING, THIS IS NOT A PLAYGROUND" comes to mind as a favorite. Got home, crashed out, got up and went to Cici's pizza for the 5 dollar buffet - was pretty yum, and you just can't beat that price can you? Then had work at 3.15 which started with yet another introductory thing with restaurant operations - felt like the same damned info again but hey, when you get paid for it it can't be bad. Was also quite fun, they had put a lot of effort into game show style quizzes etc which was all well and good. Then had my break - still full from Cici's - then went to fill at Pott's and off to Scuttles to work then close. Was all going fine but then Tina and I realised neither of us had closed Scuttles so we were flying solo. Got it all done and then had to wait like an hour for a manager to give us our "walk" - pain in the butt because I just missed a bus.

Eventually met up with Karen at West Clock waiting for the bus and found Mallory etc on the bus and had a few fun convos - mostly about Britian. Once people realise you are Scottish things get interesting but I am constantly amazed by people's lack of awareness of the country that brought you the telephone, the television, Rennie MacIntosh, Waterproof material, and a country that produces 1% of the world's academic research with just 0.1% of the world's population. It astounds and stupifies me how people can not even know where Scotland is - only realising it in relation to England. This is such a stereotypical argument and complaint of Scottish people, but that amount of guests that do not realise we are a somewhat separate entity to England is beyond belief. Some American children are also so poorly educated on any sort of Geography outside of the US it is frightening. A boy of about 12 today did not even know where England/Scotland/Ireland/Europe was despite being of Irish decent (according to his mother). Time for US kids to learn a bit less about state capitals and more about world Capitals.

Does this mean Scotland needs to promote itself more as a nation? Am I turning nationalist? No, probably not. We can't really change ignorance in a foreign nation, can we?

Tonight I got home (eventually) and David 1 was sitting with an ice pack on his ankle. Turns out they had went to play football at Mickey's Retreat (the cast member only recreation centre) and before even playing he tripped over and bruised his ankle. It's not broken, just badly swollen. What a doughnut. Will have to wait and see if it goes down a little bit by tomorrow...

ALSO! Found some Irn Bru in a shop for the Mexicans to taste- thankfully they all seem to like it.

Magical Moments

2009-06-06T02:12:00.002+01:00

Wow! What a few Days! Met up on Wednesday with my Trainer Mario who has been absoluteley amazing. Such a good guy and amazing at telling it like it is. A bit of E-Learning crap and then straight into the thick of it - making products, working the register, cleaning and more cleaning. Wed and Thursday were great - just working on the job with a bit of help and meeting some great new people. I have been mostly in Fantasyland which will be my base - Mrs Pott's Ice Cream, the Friar's Nook hot dogs and Fries, Scuttle's landing for slush drinks and the Enchanted Grove for Frozen lemonade. My favorite is either Pott's or Scuttle's - friars and grove are too quiet though I'm sure I will change my tune once the real summer rolls around...

A lot of rain the past few days which is fun to watch from the safety of your stand. Today I was on location support - basically working while I'm still training - I worked in Scuttle's for a bit and then went on break - I came back and they had nothing for me to do so I was put outside Mrs Pott's saying hello to people and just being nice. What a fun day. I worked from 4-8 outside just greeting people, talking to kids and just watching the world go by. Today's escapade just shows me what an inspiring and "happy" place this can be to work. It doesn't matter one jot what you are doing - but how you do it. Today I was getting paid to basically wave at people, call little girls Princesses and give birthday boys free Ice Cream - how cool is that? I got speaking to an older couple who were thinking about getting some Ice cream. They were with their family and we just chatted for a bit, I gave them some advice about Spectromagic (the parade) and Wishes (the fireworks) and just generally chatted. Well eventually they toddled off but not before the older guy turned to me, shook my hand and said "It was a real pleasure talking to you - you just made our day young man". What a buzz.

It's also fun getting to know a few faces and acting "the part". The good thing about "Stands East" (my locations) is that we can be moved anywhere we are needed so I spend a bit of time moving around and changing places with loads of folk.

Tomorrow is my assessment which I am a tad nervous about - I haven't got the best memory in the world but Mario reckons I'll do fine. After that I work Sunday and then off for two days. Everyone is either at Epcot or still at work so I am alone in the flat - think I might watch some online TV. G'night all.

I Go Above and Beyond.

2009-06-02T22:35:00.003+01:00

A nice few days - yesterday and today were my days off which was a mixed blessing. I was desperate to get to work but I suppose a few days off to recharge and get ready is no bad thing. Yesterday I ran some errands - washing and went to Wal Mart. Now have an American Mobile to which you can all call and text and it shouldn't cost you any more than normal (each text costs me 20c to receive, however). Number is 407 361 6731 so gimmee a call/text. Also got a few bits and bobs and my shoes for work - $$$$$$$$$$$$$$...

Went to Magic Kingdom last night for a muck about, did a couple of cool rides - Stitch's great escape, Philarmagic... The new mission is to have ridden EVERY ride/attraction at Walt Disney World by the end of the trip. Status reports will be posted intermittently.

Today we woke up early (ish) and went to Epcot. Had a good day just wandering around with no pressure to get everything in. Needless to say we squeezed in Test Track, Mission Space and a couple of other good 'uns. Soarin' had a long wait, but fear not! We can go back WHENEVER WE LIKEEEEEEEEE MUHAHAHAHAHAH. The joys of a Disney ID.

Also did the new Kim Possible World Showcase Adventure thing which was really good. You get given a fake mobile which beeps into action and gives you missions around the different countries in World Showcase. Needless to say some amazing interactive exhibits and really immersive stuff. An absolute must do and a great way to have a walk around the countries in Epcot - something I have never done until today.

Tonight I plan on a nice dinner and a bit of a chillax - my first day on the job tomorrow which is very exciting. According to Karen it will be more boring E-Learning and HACCP/Food Safety malarky though...

A never yet ever changing land...

2009-06-01T19:12:00.000+01:00

Once upon a time... is now.

2009-05-31T21:12:00.003+01:00

Yesterday was the most boring day so far, Food and Beverage basics - a lot of videos and online courses on food hygiene etc. Not great fun. Finished off, however, with a visit to Hollywood Studios where we rode Tower of Terror and Rock 'n' Rollercoaster, for Becki's enjoyment we were also forced into the Voyage of the Little Mermaid, but never mind that.

Today was my Magic Kingdom park orientation. 5AM rise to get to the Disney University by 7AM. Bit of talking and intro in the class, and then off on a bus to the happiest place on earth. Today, I was paid $8 an hour to ride the Haunted Mansion, Buzz Lightyear's space ranger spin and walk around the park before opening. I also got to walk around the backstage areas - saw where the fireworks are launched and got to go into the "Utilidoors" - basically a network of below-park corridors containing all the staff rooms, and stuff to "make the magic work". I am officially sworn to secrecy on some of the things I saw and was told about today - proper Disney-philes may have cried at some of the sights.

The fun continued later on - I got my costume. It turns out that "Stands East" means ALL food and beverage stands east of Cinderella Castle, and that includes Fantasyland, Toontown and Tomorrowland - so I get to be a bit of an all rounder and enjoy a bit of variety in my job. I picked up my costumes for Fantasyland (Green shorts, white gilded shirt and a gold waistcoat) and my generic one (Blue trousers and Striped shirt) - These are the locations I'll be doing my initial training in, and day one starts at The Friar's Nook in Fantasyland - not until Wednesday though - two days off!

Pictures of my stunner of a costume will be posted ASAP. Off for a power-nap and Epcot tonight.

Traditions and more...

2009-05-30T05:53:00.003+01:00

Enjoyed my first "official" day of work today - traditions class. Went to the "Disney University" behind the Magic Kingdom and had a rather long yet interesting and entertaining class all about the company's history, a bit about harassment and a load of videos to try and Disney-fy us. The main thing I got from it was that it will be what I make of it, and no more. Not every day will be fun but it's all about the effort you put in to see what you can get out - It's not what you do that defines you, its how you do what you do. Also learned about how "Safe-D" begins with me - clever.

So with my new name badge and ID fresh in my wallet we rushed home, got out of our formal gear and into some shorts and shot off to the Magic Kingdom. Me, Dave, Dave, Becky and Rachel went and rode the Haunted Mansion, Small World, Splash Mountain and Thunder Mountain, as well as watching Wishes. In fact, Becki did just two of the above - she's scared of rides... will have to sort that before the program is out.

Tomorrow is Food and Beverage basics back at Disney University and Sunday is a very early start for my introduction - "Once upon a time... is now!". In picture below notice new name tag "Callum: Glasgow, Scotland" and The Disney point - two fingers is much less aggressive than just one...

Safe-D begins with me...

2009-05-30T05:50:00.001+01:00

TERMINATED.

2009-05-28T18:07:00.002+01:00

What happens? TERMINATION. DEPORTATION. END OF LIFE AS YOU KNOW IT.

That sums up today thus far - don't do this, do this, don't do that, don't even think of that. Formalities aside we had a great wee night at Downtown Disney last night with Rachel and Becki from across the way - just wandered about and had a McDonalds - regretted that later as I had bought a tonne of food at Wal-Mart yesterday too - fridge is now well stocked.

Today started at 8 with more briefings and lectures on employment and tax more specifically - forms to fill out and signing your life away. If you come up with any amazing ideas for Disney they are THEIR ideas, and you get diddly from them - not a jot. That's corporate America I suppose.

Now just had some lunch and waiting for my 2PM appointment to find out where I'm working, sort out banking etc. and generally just get told even more info.

Traditions tomorrow, my first official day of work when I get my badge, my ID (which gets us into the parks - hooray!) and even more Disney trivia and background - that should be more fun than today.

David no. 1 continues to take videos and pictures which, I am reliably informed, will be edited in such a way to create a travelogue masterpiece the likes of which you have never seen. Coming to a theatre near you, Summer 2020.

Disney International College Program - Part 1

2009-05-27T17:36:00.003+01:00

Here now, after a long day of traveling and waiting around yesterday. Longlonglonglonglonglong LONG flight and then a big furore when some people seemed to loose their bags in the transfer system. Eventually went to get the bus service thing and then had a game of tetris trying to fit all the cases into the back - I prevailed eventually. Finally arrived at Vista way at around 7PM local time. Arrived and was ferried into a big room with loads of others and were each given our packs, room keys/locations and loads of info. I'm now living at Vista Way apartments, with two scousers - David and David, two Mexicans - Billy and Carlos and a Venezuelan - Carlos. Bare bones flat but I have been in worse, two to a room and I'm sharing with David no. 2.

Late night trip to Wal-Mart last night which was ridiculously large - clearly Tesco Extra at Silverburn has a lot to learn. Everything comes in ridiculously big sizes - impossible to buy anything unless you are staying for an age/are a fat American. We decided to get everything we would need - communal stuff which worked well until we tried to get everything back on the loaded bus. That was fun.

Unpacked more stuff and eventually got to bed around midnight - looking for a bit of sleep before up at half 7 for our first day of training today. Went off ahead of time this morning to the Commons for this housing induction - just a lot more about rules and regs to get us started. Now sitting in the flat and enjoying the internet which wasn't working last night, just had a "Hot Pocket" for lunch, which was strangely tasty. Just waiting to go to part 2 of today's training and getting housing IDs etc.

It's all very exciting isn't it? For those of you who I gave an address please now use this one:-

Callum Smith
13501 Meadow Creek Drive
Apt 2708
Orlando
Fl
32821

I would literally curl with delight to get a letter or phone call - you can phone me on 407-560-2280 and ask for extension 2545.

Eurovision

2009-05-18T01:37:00.002+01:00

I missed the show live this year because of show duties, but no big deal because I can watch it back on On Demand.

Shocked? Yes, I do like Eurovision. Not because of the (generally atrocious) music, but for what it represents and what it (in a sense) aims to do. Just as the Olympics and Commonwealth games are now a commercial endeavour, so too is the Eurovision. More than that, however, I believe it represents an opportunity to celebrate the diversity of Europe, and gives us a chance to be a smidgen proud about being European. Something that seems to happen less and less.

In the last few days we received a leaflet from the UKIP asking for our vote in the European elections. Their aim? To abolish Britain's membership of the European Union. I normally disregard such blatantly nationalist and frankly racist promotions but this one grated particularly. I am intensely proud of being Scottish, British and European. I think having a union of countries who can share resources, have a collective parliament and can allow free movement for all can only be a good thing, and is something to be very proud of. The European union allows a real sense of community in which is a completely contrasting continent, from the vineyards of rural France to the icy vasts of Iceland. To have this union of countries is an opportunity to find community in diversity, and at a young age I already feel to have benefited from it.

I took part in a European Theatre Lab through my high school, and to meet people from Germany, Poland and The Czech Republic and to explore the themes of oppression, European-ness and community was a great opportunity to both form an opinion on the role of Europe in my life and to meet some fantastic people. Without the EU, it would never have happened - both from a financial and practical standpoint. The "prestige" of the EU has also lead to a certain appeal in conforming to more stringent standards of human rights and political freedom in nations who have applied to join our community. The growing number of countries considered part of the EU adds a strength to decision making, and makes the union of countries both larger in size and political clout.

These are all, however, practical reasons for the EU. Much more important, to me, is the sense of community achieved through the union. Sitting, enduring the Eurovison song contest makes me proud to be European, in a sense celebrating eccentricity and diversity in a vast and ever growing number of countries (many of which, I should point out, lie outside what we might term "Europe"). The free movement aspect is not only practical, it really encourages travel to places we would never have imagined 15 years ago - Poland, Lithuania, Estonia, Romania....

We Brits, in our constant state of cynicism, tend to poke fun at the Eurovision and indeed several will do the same towards the EU. "We're spending a fortune on it", "We have to listen to ridiculous Health and Safety guides from Brussels" or even the dreaded "I'm British, not European". If we want to remain in good standing with the rest of Europe I profusely believe that we need to embrace the whole idea of a European Union more heartedly - learn a language, travel more, embrace the sense of community. As for Eurovision, no amount of blogging will change the British attitude to this unconventional contest - even if we do eventually win it. For me, the joy of it is in experiencing the differing styles of music, the fascination with singing in English, the changing fads in the UK which have yet to reach Greece and the enthused hosting and showmanship of the whole thing. This year, Russia spent approximately 27.8 Million Euros on the entire contests organisation, had 40% of the world's LED screens on stage and spent over a month transforming the Olympic stadium.

Do we deserve to ever win again? After a few years of bitter attitudes towards the contest and allegations of "political voting" could we ever put the same effort or national pride into a staging of the contest as our European counterparts? Probably not, but it is indeed a relief to see that a relative talent has represented our nation, and made a very respectable job of it.

Tweeter-iffic.

2009-05-02T14:24:00.002+01:00

I'm on twitter! Follow at www.twitter.com/callumsmith1234 for (un)insightful stories of my day and endless reasons to procrastinate further.

It's almost here.

2009-04-20T15:02:00.002+01:00

Time flies when you are having fun, but also when you are a busy wee bastard. For the past few months it feels like there have been endless tests, work, shows and whatnot - and I am only just realising how close this (academic) year is to being up. Come May the 26th, Callum Smith sets off for Orlando Florida to work in Quick service food and beverage at Walt Disney World. Three months of fun and work in the sun at the worlds busiest tourist destination - it's going to be amazing!

So so so much still to do, but the Visa is in, the tickets are payed for and the job is confirmed. LETS DO IT!

is anyone reading...?

2008-11-27T23:35:00.002Z

It has been a while since the last post, and what a few months it has been.

We're now well into the swing of 2ND Year at Glasgow Uni, with big scary decisions to be made about next years year abroad.
Just wrapped two fantastic ST@G productions (Student Theatre @ Glasgow). Fist came the symbolically hilarious Canterbury Tales in the GU debates Chamber. Next came the biggie - ST@G nights 2008 - Circa. We made a big top. We put short plays in that big top. We threw in some mimes, jugglers, poi dancers, contortionists and a ring master for good measure - the result was three nights of packed houses and fulfilling theatre. Well done to all involved.

News also about a new job coming up as a casual technician at Eastwood Theatre! How exciting. Not only that but my recent interview for a summer job at Walt Disney World was a success - partially.

Yes, I was offered a job for the big cheese, but as a burger flipper - not a ride-button-pusher as I had hoped. This puts me in a dilemma as to whether or not this is a good Idea. There seems limited scope to change, if any at all - but could I be passing up a great few months out of snobbery - you never know, it might still be excellent.

I have no time to think of this at the moment, essay for next week and two French tests, but it seems to be the only thing on my mind. I am desperate beyond belief to go, but selling popcorn, sodas and hot dogs to overweight Americans is hardly my 'thang yo'.

WHAT WILL HAPPEN? FIND OUT IN THE NEXT INSTALLMENT...

Best of the Fest

2008-08-10T14:46:00.002+01:00

Barry and Stuart - Part time Warlocks
Hilareous comedy magic, great gross out gags all add up for a great night out. Audience interaction, amazing tricks delivered with panache and a good dose of humour - these magicians don't take themselves too seriously.
**** - Dehli Belly, The Underbelly 10ish nightly

The Elephant Man
Powerful and moving devised production. Our Protagonist is a multi talented actor who can make us laugh and cry in the same heartbeat - all this together with some breathtaking theatrical devices make this a stunning piece. See This.
***** - C SoCo, 4 ish daily

The Great American Trailer Park Musical
Every year the festival sees a large American musical come to try and make it big across the pond, Jihad the Musical last year comes to mind. This year it is The Great American Trailer Park Musical and it deserves to do well. This stellar cast can sing, the script and score are hilareously moving and will have you dancing in your seat and the entire production is worthy of anyones attention. You must make your way to C-1 to see this fantastic piece of trailer trash, though its probably not for the easily offended.
***** - C-1, Chambers Street - 10PM nightly

Libraries

2008-05-20T13:18:00.002+01:00

Are amazing places. The past few days I have been spending a lot of time in the Glasgow uni one, and I have realised how much I like it. So quiet, the only noises are smart noises two - rustling of papers, sipping of water, shelving of books.

There are HUNDREDS of people studying here just now - so many smart people everywhere and the amount of knowledge on all the shelves is amazing. There are over 2 million books in this buidling.

Black Watch

2008-04-16T23:30:00.002+01:00

You know how something can be hyped up so so so much, that you begin to doubt that it will actually be that good? That was exactly the case with this much anticipated and hyped production of Black Watch - I had been counting down the days until this fateful day arrived like an excited schoolgirl waiting until the next Girls Aloud concert.

So today arrived, and I was excited. So so so excited. And in we went. The excitement was building - how good would the acting be? How would it be at the SECC? Would the sign language person put us off? Would the play be any good at all?

GREAT, PERFECT, NO AND ABSOLUTELY IMMENSE.

This run is sold out. But if you can get a ticket or if it tours again then you must walk over children, the elderly and your family to get tickets and go to see it. It was, quite simply the best piece of theatre I have ever seen. Powerful and intense from start to finish, funny in places and with some of the most focused performances I have ever had the joy to witness.

Though critics and theatre-snobs might say that the production has "sold out" since its beginnings at an Edinburgh drill hall and that a performance at the SECC is just plain wrong I feel that there would have to be something more than a change of venue to affect this stellar production.

So, up yours theatre snobs. My advice to you all is to get yourselves to "Black Watch" whenever and wherever you can and enjoy it for what it is - one of Scotland's final theatrical exports.

Name : Callum Smith. Occupation : Flame Attendant.

2008-04-08T21:38:00.003+01:00

If I was the Chinese government, and wanted to defend the olympic torch as it makes it's way around the globe, my Flame attendants would be burly, not like these mugs.

Return to Academia.

2008-04-08T21:24:00.002+01:00

yesterday was my first day back after my 3 week easter break. Tough. I had forgotten all the good things about university though. And driving in and out makes my day so much more bearable. I forgot how much I love the library, the smell of those old books and the constant "competition" to find the book you need before others do, and the crazy game-show style rush to get that 24 hour loan book back as the clock ticks down. I forgot how good Dougall Campbell is, and these last few days of translations and new vocab have re-kindled my love of the french, to an extent.

I also realised how much I hate Film And Television. Why? I don't know.

Coming soon in Glasgow is the Arches Theatre Festival at the arches. Check out the fantastic program at and get tickets pronto.

Also coming up is the Glasgow Underground Festival, thats right. A festival. On the subway. The famous clockwork orange.

THAT SOUNDS AMAZING!

Driving Part 2

2008-03-31T20:21:00.002+01:00

At long last. I have finally passed my Driving Test. This morning at 8.40AM I graced the roads of Shieldhall and Govan (If you can grace the worst roads in glasgow) and passed my test. At last.

I then began to think about how much I have moaped and moaned. The reality is that there are few shortcuts. All it takes is practice, skill and a level head. So my advice is as follows - PRACTICE with a parent or friend, Get as many lessons as you need before the test and if you get nervous in stressful situations pump yourself with some beta blockers which helped me enormously.

I got home and went out in the car for the first time. Lost for ideas I went to see my granny. Much as I would love to say it was "amazing" and "the best feeling ever" it wasn't. The truth is it was horrible, nerve wracking and fraught with stupid mistakes. But still, it was a truly excellent feeling.

Today I also discovered how poor a sense of direction I have. I saw an A-Z map in the garage but it was a fiver, and I'm a tight bastard.

The New BBC3

2008-03-25T23:24:00.002Z

There are really annoying introductions by people at home - one especially irritating one by a guy who seems to think it's funny to dress up like a Victorian and put on stupid voices. Newsflash - It's not funny. At all.

Ipod Nano

2008-03-22T14:37:00.002Z

This is a warning. I bought a new iPod Nano on ebay the other day - a good deal, I have needed a new one for about as long as I have had my iPod Mini.

Of course there was the ardent anticipation of the new arrival, and as it arrived the hurried excitement of "unboxing" the little cherub. There it was, shiny and black in it's tiny little perspex case gleaming like a ... new iPod.

A rush upstairs to connect it to my Powerbook and lo, the message appeared : "The iPod "Ipod" cannot be used because it requires Mac OS X 10.4.8 or later". Bastard.

A blatant money making scheme from apple to make us upgrade our favorite OS? almost definitely. Though it does provide me with an excellent excuse to soup up my aging notebook one is not entirely amused.
So heed this warning Mac Users - be wise, be safe, be smart. Check your specs.

Incidently if you, like me and so many others, enjoy "Unboxing" your new gadgets you will undoubtedly enjoy this website : http://unboxing.gearlive.com/

Driving

2008-03-19T14:00:00.003Z

I am currently, and have been for over a year, learning to drive. I have an instructor. He is not very good, for me at least. I am not a very good driver. I have failed my test 4 times. I won't bore you with the details but some of them have been horrendous, some have really been rather close.

I have at many points over the past few months of testing contemplated giving up, but would that be foolish? I think so, yes. Considering the amount of money spent on lesson after lesson and now test after test - my 11 year old Citröen AX is sitting on the drive begging me to finish what I have started. But yes, I am almost ready to give up and forget on that dream of setting out on the open road....

But why? The most frustrating part of "driving" has been the test - nothing to do with the whole learning experience which most people find very enjoyable, as I did. The test is nervewracking to the point that I am now on Beta Blocker tablets to keep me calm, stressful to the point that I can feel my stomach churning and neck itching simply writing this blog, tedious to the point that a simple touch of the kerb during a maneuver has failed me in the past and expensive to the point that each test costs £50 for the DSA and £40 for my Instructor.

I might be protesting but for so many people it's a piece of piss. A first time pass here, maybe second time pass there and so it continues - so why do so many others find it damn near impossible? My friends and I have come up with a reason - us arty folk have too much else on our minds - art, culture, writing, theatre..... - whereas those with an aptitude for sports and science don't have an issue - bish, bash, bosh.

excuses excuses...

And thus, a blog was born...

2008-03-10T14:47:00.001Z

Though this blog may wind up being lost in the voids of cyberspace, I intend for it to be an interesting place to visit, and somewhere you will visit again and again.

Post The First : Bars use smoke and mirrors to flout ban
* Ed Pilkington in New York
* The Guardian,
* Saturday March 8 2008

All good bars have a touch of theatre: like the stage they use lighting and scenery to create a mood. But in Minnesota they have taken the connection a step further.

More than 100 bars across the state have started holding "theatre nights" in which patrons are encouraged to dress up in period costume and project their voices, playbills are pinned on the walls, and bar paraphernalia makes up the props.

The bars are seeking to bypass a smoking ban introduced last October by exploiting a loophole that allows cigarettes to be puffed in theatrical productions.

What began as an idea by a Minnesota lawyer, Mark Benjamin, to get round what he saw as an unjustified prohibition has snowballed into a state-wide protest. Bars have taken to calling their theatre nights "Before the Ban", which allows them to claim that their customers are in character playing themselves before the October injunction came down.

One bar in the north of the state, the Queen City Sports Place, calls its night The Tobacco Monologues. Black cloth is draped over entrances, with notices saying "Stage Entrance". And ashtrays are piled up under the label "Props".

Other bars hand out badges to anyone who donates a dollar saying "Act Now!"

The state authorities are not amused. The health department, responsible for the smoking ban, has been advised that the theatre nights break the new law, and has threatened to hit participating bars with fines of up to $10,000 (£4,800) as well as remove their licences.

Health commissioner Sanne Magnan told the Post-Bulletin in Rochester, Minnesota, that she expected bars to comply. "That's the spirit of Minnesota. We want to do the right thing when the public is overwhelmingly in support of something."

Benjamin has issued a challenge to the state authorities to hold a live, unscripted television debate on whether or not his wheeze is legal. "We will hash this out once and for all," he said.

Guardian : Saturday 8/3/08